Tag Archive | Desteni Message

Day 165: On the take

The point I’m seeing within myself and am applying self-forgiveness for is manipulation and the extent that I have seen that I will go in how I have manipulated myself and others in my attempt at surviving within our current world/money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ‘on the take’, where I’ve lived my life always seeking to take from what is here yet never willing to give unconditionally to all that which I believed I had the right to take.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to bombard myself with secret fears of giving in to the desires of my mind thus ‘taking from’ that which gives me life as who I am as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I am on the take I am willing to use, abuse and manipulate to get what I want when I want it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I’m on the take I will tell you what you want to hear to try and make you trust me and then I will swoop in and thank you for giving me that which you swore you would never let go of because that’s how evil lives.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I’m on the take I have one goal in mind and that is that I am always looking for ways to make money and I won’t care who has to go without in order for me to reach my goal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how when I am on the take I am accepting and allowing myself to be used up within a world/money system that plays us against each other and yet we don’t realizes the odds are always in favor of the world/money system as the win.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have spent my life always feeling like I had to look out for me and if that meant that I had to take from others then so be it, and within that not realizing that I was never actually living because I was constantly paying for the service of being able to live.

When and as I see myself thinking about ways to take from others instead of giving – I stop, I breathe. I see, realize and understand that it is vital that I direct me as my mind instead of my mind directing me. Thus, I commit myself to stop existing in self-interest and greed and stop manipulating others and to instead ground myself here standing in support of a world according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to facing who I am as the role that I play within our current world/money system.

I commit myself to slow myself down and stop allowing myself to rush through my life as I see, realize and understand that in my rushing I have been abusing myself and others as myself.

I commit myself to not give up on myself as I continue walking this process because I see, realize and understand how I have been manipulating myself in how I’ve been participating in thoughts of fear and frustration according to some recent pain and changes within and as my physical body.

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Day 157: The Nature of the Human will Always Surrender to Money

Read the following for context: Innocent victims

Children in Syria are being bombed, tortured, sexually abused, murdered, no one really cares.
No one wants to talk about what everyone knows. When there is war, there is somebody who wants something that somebody else has, and of course, that something has to do with money/power. When it comes to money, the human will destroy everyone and everything in it’s path to get it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to cover my ears and eyes to not  hear or see how the two million children and young people of Syria are living in constant danger, because when I comprehend such a thing I become fearful and then I begin to fear for the safety of my own children, and that’s when I see how self-interest overrules my concern for others and I realize that as a humanity we’re in trouble because we will stop at nothing to have and be the power that having money gives, thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in self-interest and greed look to protect and support only my family and my friends and in self-interest ignore the suffering of others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the thought as an image within my mind, where I see me fearing that my country is bombed and my children and grandchildren are in harms way, and within that I forgive myself for existing in and as self-interest where the level of cruelty that exists within our world goes unnoticed until I see my own family at risk thus proving to myself how the nature of the human is self-interest driven.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself cowering in sorrow in realizing that I could have stopped the pain and suffering of innocent children but instead I turned the other cheek because I feared what others would think and say about me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deny that the nature of the human is evil because I see, realize and understand that the nature of the human is nothing more than greed in lust for money and power because the human will always surrender life itself for money and power in an attempt to control others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how I become tense in my shoulders and upper back and how I hold my breath when I read articles about children suffering and dying and how I react in separation of me as my physical body in how I submit myself to/as fear as a negative energy experience and then, as if on autopilot, I immediately use positive thought participation which causes my level of anxiety to decrease and I began to feel physically better even though in doing so I am manipulating myself and taking myself from a negative energy experience to positive one and within that never actually facing the reality of who and what I am in relation to who, what and how I am responsible for as the abuse, war and death that exists within our current world/money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel anxious and disappointed when I realize that there is nothing in this world so demoralizing as the horrors that man will do to man and animals in the name of money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extent that I have manipulated myself through and as the direction of who I am as my mind as consciousness, to such an extent that I have been willing to accept and allow war to exist where children are murdered while they sleep, and within that,  to not realize that when I accept war to exist anywhere within this world, that I am actually accepting and allowing the defeat of us each one as a humanity.

When and as I see myself closing my eyes, ignoring the suffering within our world, I stop, I breathe. Instead, I commit myself to show the suffering and death that innocent children are having to endure so that money can be made while life itself is abused and ignored, furthermore, I commit myself to show that every single living being is of equal importance as life and serves a purpose for us each one to see ourselves within and as.

I commit myself to breathe and forgive myself and through self-corrective application apply myself daily to commit myself to myself in self-honesty to re-design myself according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to stop existing as a coward where I manipulate myself using sorrow as a way of avoiding facing what I’ve accepted and allowed, to instead stand up to/for myself and direct myself in realizing that life is not about fear, that life is here for us to recognize who we are as each other, therefore, I commit myself to walking the self-correction of me in becoming equal to and one as life where our world will one day exist where all living beings are guaranteed a life of/as/in dignity.

When and as I see myself react in anxiety in realizing the abuse we accept and allow within our world, where I tense parts of me as my physical body and then manipulate myself with positive energy to distract myself from facing myself within it all,  I stop, I breathe. I commit myself to stop the separation of me from my physical body and my physical world/reality, to therefore commit myself to redesigning who I am in support of me as my physical body and thus support our physical world/reality by remaining aware of who I am as breath.

I commit myself to show how with Equal Money the nature of the human being will begin to change because Equal Money will ultimately remove our fear of survival, thus we will be able to witness the nature of ourselves begin to change from one of evil and struggling to that which honors all living beings enjoying each other as life.

Day 150: Inter the Suicide Net

Suicide Nets

Suicide by Worker

Inside Apple’s Foxconn Factories everything remains the same, however, outside the building of the factory giant – which employs 1.2 million people and supplies many of the biggest names in consumer internet gadgets and iPhones – the ‘net’ is taking on more and more meaning.

Employee dormitories are now equipped with protective and/or suicide nets which can be seen in the picture below.

When I saw the picture – which has been making it’s rounds on face book – something about it just didn’t sit well with me.  One doesn’t have to be the smartest kid in class to know by now that people within our world don’t really give a shit about each other no matter how much we pretend to.

The proof of how little we care is everywhere. We don’t care about the thirty-thousand + number of children around the world who starve to death daily, or the thousands upon thousands of people who don’t have clean water to drink, or even a toilet to shit in.  We only care about me, me, me and what can I get, get, get so I can FEEL better.  Ever notice the FEE in feeling?

So what’s the purpose of providing nets to the 1.2 million employees in China who are slaves to 76-hour work weeks?  That’s working 11 days in a row earning as little as £150 a month so that the rest of us – who don’t really give a shit about their overworked and underpaid lifestyle – can get some internet gadgets and iphones.

The way I see it, the nets that have been placed outside the factory dormitories, they’re like ‘hush money’, and prove how we exist in absolute denial of the Real Problem that exists within our current world/money systems.

It’s like saying: ” you know what, we really don’t care whether or not you want to kill yourself on our time but by God at least the nets will make sure you aren’t able to do it where the world can see it because the world doesn’t want to witness your suffering because we fear seeing the truth of what we accept and allow, so if we don’t see your pain we’ll never have to face ourself in realizing how equality is all that will make us stop caring only about making money.

When is enough enough?

Sharing is Caring – Investigate: Equal Money

Day 141: Making sense out of a system that doesn’t make sense

Along with pain and not physically feeling well from my recent dental appointments, which are still ongoing. I wasn’t prepared to be catapulted into the jaws of our current money system. Where every day this past week, it’s like I’ve been chewed up and spit out by a system that couldn’t care less if I survive it or if I end up on the side of the road bleeding to death. What I’ve realized, is that Money still has the power to change me, and, I realize that I am responsible for the power that I have given to a money system that supports abuse and profit over the life of those living within it. As a way of protecting myself, ‘as my mind’, I see how I’ve become nonchalant in my attitude – another character I’ve become to protect myself from myself. Thus, the following Self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a character of/as my mind who is nonchalant towards others and their Quest to survive because I got lost once again in my own self-interest within energetic wants, needs and desires within a money system that is anything but forgiving and within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe myself as willing to stand up for all living beings when in fact I’ve only begun to understand what standing up for and as All living beings really means in terms of what I must be willing to give up and stop as who I am and what I’ve accepted and allowed in order to actually have an impact on bringing about a world according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become hardened and uncaring as a way of giving myself a false sense of perceiving myself as protected within a money system that thrives on taking instead of giving, thus, I commit myself to stop, to breathe and stop fearing the future and to remain here in this moment and face who I am in self-honesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel nonchalant toward the fears of others in their attempt to make sense of what we have All accepted and allowed within our world, therefore, I commit myself to stop who I am as fear and to direct myself to do unto others as I would like done unto me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move myself according to the energy I receive according to how much money I have and for how I have incorporated that as who I am within how I move myself as my physical body and within my physical reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and make sense within a world/money system that doesn’t make sense within all the abuse it exists as, thus, I stop, I breathe, I direct myself to slow down and face who I am within all that is here, to thus, assist and support a system which will support all life according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted, allowed, and supported a world/money system that generates fear and stress in our day to day living where living isn’t living at all really only struggling to just survive, thus, I commit myself to show how with Equal Money day to day living will be enjoyable and stress free because everyone’s day to day necessities will be given to everybody equally.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the changes that must be made in order to change our world to one that is supportive of and as all living beings, thus, I commit myself to show how it makes more sense to ensure that all living beings are provided for with Equal Money – than to continue to allow a world/money system where people are constantly competing with each other to survive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a world/money system that sees value in people according to how much money they have/make, and for how I’ve ignored the depth of daily stress being lived by those who have little to no money to provide for themselves, thus, I commit myself to never stop supporting an Equal Money System because I see, realize and understand how with Equal Money we will manifest Heaven on Earth.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how every day thousands of people have absolutely nothing and starve to death while others have more than they could possibly use in a one lifetime therefore, I commit myself to show how only the best and most nutritious food will exist with an Equal Money System.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when things are going my way and I have money in my pocket then I don’t stop to consider how others are experiencing themselves as fearful and stressed out from not knowing how they will survive from one minute to the next, thus, I commit myself to show how with Equal Money, people will stop manipulating and stealing because with Equal Money people will begin to understand the nature of themselves and thus will begin to forgive and correct themselves and begin to assist and support each other.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support a world/money system that is driven to only support itself through the ways and means of abuse of and as a Capitalistic system, thus, I commit myself to show how we will bring an end to Capitalism through manifesting Heaven on Earth with Equal Money.

Day 130: The Evil That Men Do

For Context please read the following:
Farming rhinos – –
Forget cocaine: Rhino horn is the new drug of status – –

“The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary. Men alone are quite capable of every wickedness.” ~ Joseph Conrad

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the depth of fear I have to/toward that which I’ve only begun to understand, which is the acts of man as the Mind of Consciousness, where most disturbingly, our abuse to animals in how we have reduced them to becoming a commodity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how money is the motivating factor within 99.9 % of all abuse, war, torture and death and how the single act of supporting an Equal Money system can and Will bring 99.9% of all abuse, war, torture and death to an end.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the belief in finding cures for disease and illness through abuse and/or the death of another will Never result in the Solution for and as Life.

I forgive myself for not realizing how deadly the animal relationship to human is in the servant master relationship as that which we have accepted and allowed within our world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the depth of my dishonesty, in how I have schemed and looked for others to fail so that I could earn more Money than them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how in my desire to look and ‘feel good about myself’, I never considered at what cost to the animal were my so-called dreams of looking younger and pretty, all the while clueless as to who had to suffer and/or die in order to produce the products I desired.

I forgive myself for not realizing how in-denial I’ve been throughout my life in that I have been so consumed in the race to get and buy, that I never saw the extent of torture, pain and death that I accepted and allowed others to experience because I was too absorbed in/as self-interest and greed and never considered the life of another.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I react to the evil within this world through anger, spite and hate, that I am in-fact existing as the same as that which I perceive myself as being different from, therefore, I commit myself to forgive myself for who I am within the senseless torture, mutilation and death to/of animals for profit and gain and, I commit myself to change myself from within and to in self-honesty walk as a living example of change supportive of and as life, to thus bring about Heaven on Earth through Equal Money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how I have existed as the evil that lives and walks upon this earth, and how I see, realize and understand that evil can only exist because I have given permission for it to, thus, I commit myself to stop who I am as consciousness, and to support a world where All living beings are suppported with the utmost dignity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I cannot undo that which I’m guilty of, however, I can through self-forgiveness begin to change that which I’ve accepted and allowed, thus, breath by breath, I commit myself to educate myself and investigate the inner workings of myself as my mind in order to stop the evil within so as to stop manifesting the evil that men do as our world, to take responsibility for and to redesign Our World according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself for not comprehending and realizing the physical expression of nature and animals, and for not realizing what it is I am to learn from/as them in order to realize who I am as life, thus, I commit myself to apply myself within and as compassion and patience so as to bring forth from within myself an understanding of what it really is to stand up for and as All living beings Equally.

I forgive myself for not realizing that I have lived my life as a Character of Expectation of/as my mind and as that, I’ve not been willing to give that which I have expected to receive, therefore, I commit myself to give unto others as I would like to receive, which is the ability to provide for my physical body with a home, food, clean water, an education and healthcare and, the ability to share one’s self-expression free from fear within a World System that supports All Life according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to show how the world will only change when real change begins first within, thus I commit myself to let go of expectations, competition, greed and the desire to have and be more, and, through self-forgiveness I commit myself to breathe as I walk self-change together as a group, neighbor for neighbor.

“I commit myself to when I see that I am criticising others and blaming others in relation to my expectations not being met to accept and allow myself to slow down as I now see, realise and understand that I had created my experience of disappointment within and as myself where my expectations were not met, not seeing realising and understanding that I was the one that created the ideas / beliefs within and as myself and now that they are not manifesting I am blaming others, when it is in fact I that should investigate the ideas and beliefs that I had created within and as myself as I held onto the ideas and beliefs in hope and in dictating that they should become manifest and through this I commit myself to see, realise and understand that if I have ideas and beliefs how I would like others to behave to instead creating expectations within and as myself of others / self to manifest these ideas / beliefs to instead walk the physical timeline, look at the physical consequences and determine whether these ideas / beliefs are standing what is best for all in all ways.” ~Esteni De Wet

Day 126: Hunger Games Self-Committment statements

This blog is a continuation to: Day 125: Hunger Games – –

I commit myself to stop my fear of facing me within the abuse and neglect that I see that I have accepted and allowed and have assisted as in supporting how life on earth exists for the thousands upon thousands who suffer and/or starve to death daily at the hands of our current world/money system.

Artwork by: Agnieszka Dine

I commit myself to forgive and let go of/stop the anger within myself that I realize I have existed as where I have projected blame onto others and within that have contributed to the abuse existent within and as our world, thus, I commit myself to show how the nature of who we are as our thoughts and our thinking process which we participate within, is the glue that is holding the abuse in full force within our world and how through self-forgiveness we are able to support ourself to effectively change, thus I commit myself to realign myself through a self-corrective application to thus redesign and assist myself to become the living change required in order to support a world according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to show how the entertainment industry which we accept and allow within our world is a direct result of and in complete support of our world/money system of which the majority of us as humanity are enslaved to, thus, I commit myself to show how we are not what we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to believe ourselves to be as the direction of consciousness simply because it’s coming up within us, and that we are capable to stop and direct and commit ourselves to take self-responsibility and establish an environment on earth based upon principles that support All life Equally.

I commit myself to show how there is enough resources available on/from earth to provide for the physical bodies of all living beings, thus no one need to ever go to bed hungry, homeless or abused in any way.

I commit myself to comprehend and thus support an Education system that will be designed to provide everyone with proper skills in reading, mathematics and communication in order to establish a healthy, equal relationship with each other as a humanity, nature and animals so as to provide each with the adequate necessities for a practical living environment.

I commit myself to remaining constant and gentle with myself as I continue my daily walk of The Journey to Life.

“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when the Actual FUNCTIONING of the MIND and the Physical Body is Understood, All the Lies of Enlightenment will End and will No Longer form the Foundation from which Cruelty is justified.” ~ Bernard Poolman

Day 125: Hunger Games

Please reference and/or watch the Movie Hunger Games for context – –

I forgive myself for not realizing how our world/money system keeps us enslaved to and as a humanity in crisis.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support a world/money system where for entertainment purposes the rich continue to profit while we accept and allow movies that make a mockery out of the reality of our world – where there are literally thousands who die daily from starvation yet we ignore hunger as we accept and allow the perception/denial within and as our mind that life is a game – to the point where the movies make ‘lessons’ of life when life is Not a lesson, and how we accept and allow ideas for/as entertainment into and as our minds in order to numb us to the reality of what is real and deadly within our world/reality – even though the facts in/of and as life prove to us how suffering and despair is increasing within our capitalistic money system while the social violence of oppression and poverty remain intact and growing rapidly, while we sit and watch through the eyes of our own enslavement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to spite and blame others for the making of the movie Hunger Games, instead of realizing how I exist as, and accept and allow the same within me as those who were directly involved in and responsible for the making of the movie, thus, I am equally responsible for existing as the same system of acceptance of and as the systems of abuse within and as our world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed in silence that which I’m ashamed to admit in how I am responsible for and have defended and supported our current money system while trying to make sense of the struggle I exist as within just trying to survive it and, how I have denied that I’m a slave, because after all, I’m able to freely shop where I want to shop, however, I never realized how what I buy is subject to the approval of those who have more money than me, thus, I forgive myself for not realizing that I have never had control of/or free will over my life because the details of what I’m allowed to be and what I’m able to pick and choose from, have already been chosen for me, thus, I see, realize and understand that I am a slave to the very system in which I support, thus I am a slave to myself in every moment that I continue to support a system that does Not support All Life according to what’s Best For All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within ego, greed and pride to such a degree that I never realized how I have lived my life as if I’m racing to win a game and within that have been so stuck in my own mind of thoughts and in feeling sorry for myself that I never considered that something is very wrong with our current world/education/money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to while watching the movie: Hunger Games to ‘feel’ overwhelmed, where I saw how I had backchat thoughts within my mind of: “we might as well give up because we’ll never change because the reality of our world is very similar already to the movie” and, I forgive myself for not realizing how movies like ‘Hunger Games’ are made to support our current world/money system by capitalizing on our feelings and emotions using fear and intimidation, thus, I see, realize and understand that ‘We Are the System’, and therefore We / I can make the Decision to see movies like ‘Hunger Games’ as a definitive ‘wake up’ call – to see for ourself that in order for real change to occur within this world is going to require us coming together as a group to support each other – and how only with an Equal Money System are we prepared with the Solution to bring about Heaven on Earth.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within the positive polarity of and as a feel-good energy in how I’ve defined myself according to the words: ‘May the odds ever be in your favor’, where within that I have believed that life is about the ‘luck of the draw’, when in fact, life as how we’ve lived it, is about who has the most money/power and is the only thing that determines life as we know it, thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing world/money systems where we place odds on living and dying as we place those with money in power to play the odds in determining who of us lives and/or dies, therefore, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to manifest a world/money system that is ineffective in that it produces enslavement of/for the very people who support it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience anxiety within me as my physical body when watching the movie ‘Hunger Games’, where I felt my heartbeat increase and a flush of heat throughout the middle area of my body and, I forgive myself for becoming angry at how hunger and the constant struggle to survive life was made ‘light of’ within the movie, just like it is made ‘light of’ within our physical reality within and as the acceptance and allowance of our current world/money system.

I forgive myself for not realizing how I put the thoughts of and as my mind above me as my physical body and this physical reality and how within that is where I see I fall, because only as the direction of and as consciousness as my mind do I think/participate in ways to have and be more than my neighbor thus, I forgive myself for not realizing the extent of how our mind directs us against each other only because we allow it.

I forgive myself for not realizing how I project my fears onto the children of this world in how I accept and allow myself to imagine the worst possible scenario because I realize that as it stands right now, our world is not fit for any child being born, thus, I fear seeing what’s going to become of the child who becomes the adult who has never known what it’s like to have a stable home life, food to eat and clean water and, I forgive myself for not realizing that within the education system that is provided for them, very few who will ever achieve a level of training and certification that will assist them to find an effective job, thus, I fear what’s to become of our future children, because they aren’t given the tools of how to effectively support themselves and their/our World Responsibly.

to be continued…