Tag Archive | alcohol

Day 118: Angelic Warfare

The ‘healthy’ cereal bars that contain more sugar than a can of cola and as much fat as cheese

Scientists aren’t quite ready to lump sugar addiction in with heroin addiction even though research has proved that sugar influences the same “feel-good” brain chemicals as that of the hardest drugs available to man. But, I mean, look at all the profit being made off of products laced with sugar. When we finally see the common sense for ourself – we’re going to ask ourselves why we’ve accepted a few to profit over OUR World when All Life can be supported as Heaven on Earth.

Make no mistake about it, alcohol is the only substance deadlier than sugar. The thing about sugar is, you have to apply and understand moderation, and, the accumulation effect of sugar in how sugar ‘gains control’.

In small amounts, sugar accumulates within our physical body over time. Add in all those pre-programmed holiday moments where we overindulge in the sweetest things. Look closely because there’s a secret to be individually understood. Our secret mind and sugar work well in supporting each other – both manifest decay unto our physical body.

I’ve been investigating the point for just over six months now – seeing the results for myself of stopping sugar. Obviously sugar is in everything – however, my total caloric intake daily, from processed sugar, hasn’t went above 8 grams, and, I allow myself at least 2 to 4 servings of fresh fruit and vegetables daily.

Three months after stopping sugar, I gave in and awarded ‘my mind’ a small piece of chocolate pie, and, just a week ago, after ‘feeling’ stressed out, I again allowed myself some chocolate pie. My partner is witness to the change in my behavior both times. The days following my acceptance was Mental Hell.

It wasn’t until I stopped eating sugar that I began to realize how severe the mental and physical withdrawal is from eating and/or stopping sugar and in how and what self manifests in doing so, such as: depression, fatigue, irritability/mood swings, dizziness and confusion. That’s just to name a few of the many obsessive compulsive behaviors one experiences when one eats sugar daily – as well as what one experiences for a short while when stopping sugar.

When we consume sugar daily, it fuels/fools our mind as consciousness in believing that we’re ‘doing ok’, as long as, we keep eating it. The first week of stopping sugar is very difficult. However, every day after that one begins to see subtle mental and physical changes that are accumulating daily. My skin is softer and clearing. I require less sleep and I’ve become more patient with myself and others.

Investigate for yourself by stopping sugar so you can see for yourself. And until then – Support Your Children – STOP purchasing products laced in sugar which support the rich to get richer while the poor cave into the cavities of a world/money system that has yet to support All Life.

The way in which we as humans consume is deadly because our starting point is self-interest and greed in our struggle to survive. Sugar is here as the sweet little white stuff that’s legal.

It gives us that sweet quick fix of comfort within an illusion of control which keeps us following the rules of and as the good slave.

Angelic Warfare – where sugar is the substance that makes the Devilish ‘Feel’ Angelic.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feed products with sugar in them to my children simply because I never considered to investigate my starting point in consuming and the effects sugar has on our physical body and our physical reality. Thus, I stop. I breathe. I commit myself to investigating for myself what is physically supportive for our bodies and our Physical reality.

I forgive myself for not realizing the rush in me when consuming sugar, wherein I experience and exist as a lust in separation from life within an energetic spin, where I loose sight of the decay I’m accepting and allowing unto me as my physical body. I Stop. I Breathe. I realize myself here as my physical body in/as blood, cells, flesh and bone which supports me within this physical reality – I commit myself to me as my physical body to care for myself within the starting point of equality – in realizing that within the starting point of consumption and greed is destruction of/as life. I Stop the Angelic Sugar consumption as Warfare upon our Physicality. I commit myself to supporting life with an Equal Money System which will be supportive in manifesting Heaven on Earth.

I forgive myself for not realizing my emotional attachments and addiction to certain foods wherein I have overindulged within the starting point of my mind as desire, thus, I commit myself to free myself from the desire of my mind, to direct myself to breathe and realize myself within the ability to eat food that will assist and support me as my physical body to function and exist at its optimum.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a world/money system where products are laced with sugar, promoted, sold and willingly fed to children for the sake of profit.

I commit myself to me as my physical body in realizing that sugar fuels/fools every cell within me as it influences, controls and overloads me as my physical body the same as any street drug high affects an addict.

I commit myself to life in supporting a world/money system which supports children, animals, All living beings according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not fully comprehend the meaning of moderation, wherein I have become the one who consumes in the race to have more than my neighbor – instead of realizing that our earth provides more than enough to sustain everyone.

I commit myself to life in support of an Equal Money System whereas All living beings will be provided with food production that focuses on effective healthy living with the outcome of longevity in support of our physical body and our physical reality.

**Please investigate the truth about sugar in a video called: The Bitter Truth.

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Day 67: Energetic HangOver

Reference below refers to the following Blogs:
Day 65: Living in Hope is a TRAP
Day 66: Radical Relationship: Dragging Faces of Anger

The past two days having accepted and allowed myself to exploit myself from one polarity to the next – seesawing from negative to positive energetic outflows, so much so that today, I experienced myself where within my physical body are degrees of feeling UP, then feeling Down – similar to how one experiences themself after to much alcohol or drugs where one experiences a ‘Hangover’- which is the result of how/what I accepted and allowed within and as energetic highs/reactions from participating in and as thoughts, feelings and emotions as well as reacting to a physical expression given in my direction from my partner – all of which I am completely responsible for. Thus, the following self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be and become physical chemical reactions as energy derived from participating in and as thoughts of hope and in/as stress within polarities of inferiority/superiority whereas the affects of/as existing as such manifest within my physical body as physical symptoms of feeling hung over/exhausted/abused/dying on the inside.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as energy to Not see/realize and understand that any reaction experience to/towards anything or anyone within existence indicates separation within a limited definition of myself Veiled in and as the mind as consciousness where I am the SUBJECT of my own Mind Control in/ as a superiority and inferiority game of my own design which subsequently is abusive to/as life itself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as energy to submit myself in/as emotions of/as superiority in my purSUIT to live thrills of/as a type of adrenaline junkie tripped out in experiences of power.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself in/as energy to Not fully grasp how damaging the act of existing in/as superiority to/towards others really is upon my physical body, nor have I comprehended the fact that I can never actually fill up the voidness feeling within myself through acts as such because self-interest and greed IS the cause of the desire to fill myself up in the first place due to a lack of intimacy within and as self within living a lie within and as a World of Inequality that I am responsible for accepting and allowing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself within and as energetic polarities to participate within the act of measuring myself as more than or less than in comparison to other living beings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as energy to function on behalf of my beingness wherein the past couple of days I’ve teetered to and from negative and positive energetic lows and highs as inferiority/superiority while dragging my partner alongside riding the outflows of/as my reactions to/toward him, wherein my self-interest has known no bounds and more than likely manifested more injustice within our physical reality considering how I’ve raised havoc within and as my physical body in/as manifesting pain in my neck and shoulders feeling like I’m carrying the weight of the my own self-dishonesty upon my shoulders.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as energetic polarities of/as inferiority/superiority to function in and as my relationships based upon past, present and future projections of myself, thus, I forgive myself that I’ve Not accepted and allowed myself to realize that in order for my past to be present through and as future projections of myself, thus I see/realize and understand that I alone as a Mind Consciousness system have been stringing myself along, layering, storing and manifesting dimensions of myself as energy from and as thoughts, feelings, emotions, and memory participation and in/as energetic polarity experiences of myself – thus, I must walk the physical consequences of my own manipulation which accumulates as outflows of stress upon/within and as me as my physical body as well as my physical reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as energy as superiority to judge my partner according to my past, present and/or my future projections of myself within an idea of how I have previously experienced myself and/or how I hope to experience myself again, thus Not realizing that through and as my own self-imposed beliefs according to how I desire to obtain myself as within an experience, I will thus become irritated and blame my partner when my experience of myself doesn’t reach the all encompassing energetic charge as I had ‘Hoped’ and expected it to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exploit myself in/as energy for the sake of acheiving myself in and as a superiority/high for the sake of taking a winning position in and as my own self-interested agenda so I could feel better about myself for surviving another day within our current capitalistic money/world system, that I honestly don’t see as changing anytime soon, and within that, I forgive myself for how I use energy as an escape for Not facing, forgiving and directing myself as the directive principle in order to bring about an actual change within self thus the ability to be the support required in order to bring about a world according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget the part of me who as a child asked my mom why was she so sad and when she replied, ‘that’s what happens when you get older’, and I saw for a moment in common sense as I walked away how that didn’t make sense and I wasn’t gping to live my life that way, Not realizing then that what I was witness to was the negative end of the polarity pole as energy in/as feelings as a human being as a Mind Consciousness system enslaved to a world/money system of which we are quite capable of stopping and redesigning according to what’s best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a world/money system that enforces polarity games through Capitalism and Profit and offers No actual support for our physical body as life by way of guaranteed food/nourishment, housing, clean water, clothes, healthcare and education for everybody, so that life is able to be Expressed instead of stressed and depressed.

I commit myself to stop my mind as energetic polarities of superiority/inferiority, positive/negative, happy/sad, right/wrong, and good/bad, and to see/realize and understand that when I accept and allow myself to remain self-responsible for the actions of myself as breath in awareness according to what’s best for all – there will never be a reason for feelings of stress, shame and/or pain associated with profit and gain.

I commit myself to show myself through writing and self-forgiveness that energy and substance as who I am can be directed to contribute to this world and the lives of all of humanity for an equal and one life for all.

I commit myself to be an example in proving that the only way to fully bring polarized versions of ourselves to an end is to support an Equal Money System whereas All living beings are fully supported according to what’s best for All, thus, allowing the nature of who we really are to begin to step forth in Self-Honesty.

Please READ the following Blogs!
The History of Superiority and Inferiority: DAY 69

Day 20: Superiority and Inferiority game

“Unless the past pass over — you will pass over before the past is over” ~ Bernard Poolman
Day 56: The Past is Over

Day 21: Friday Night Lights, Out

It’s Friday – the day when I often have the same experience of myself – the experience of craving, needing, wanting more. But, more of what? I no longer smoke or do drugs, or gamble, and I haven’t eaten any processed sugar now for over a month, lol, my mind would have me ask, what else is there? Sex? I’ve been married for 20 years, and our relationship is a really cool agreement in the process, so I can have sex whenever I want. Nope, the cravings I experienced come from deep within the secret mind.

My mind craved the energy that comes from getting attention, like the attention one gets from flirting with someone for instance. However, I was aware of how my mind would have settled for the buzz of a big guzzle of an ice cold pepsi. Or even a big slice of chocolate cake would have been nice,,, yes, sugar would have eased the craving for the energy my mind was asking for. I didn’t buy into any of it. I stopped and I breathed. I forgave myself.

At one point today, as I flipped through the television channels, I saw a commercial for a local bar/club and my mind thought was one word – party! That’s a popular Friday night event for many after working all week long. I spent a few years doing just that, getting all dressed up on a Friday night and going out to a bar, or two, for a few drinks and to dance, and of course to flirt. Jesus fucking Christ, in self-honesty -I don’t miss that shit.

I’ve walked and applied the tools offered through the Desteni process for awhile now and once you realize the truth for yourself, where you see for yourself what isn’t real and what is – you won’t go back to living the illusion of enjoying what you realize was your own personal mind-fuck in the first place…

I don’t even like referencing it,, my secret mind, because it’s all self-interest motivated and is the part of me that offers no real solution and/or support for all life on this planet – yet, I have to face me in self-honesty, so I’m able to forgive myself and maybe be of some assistance, in supporting a system to bring an end to the shit hole we’ve manifested ourselves in and as here on earth.

The truth is Friday nights was all about the lights – the lights in the illusion that I lived in my mind where fantasies did nothing more than create abuse within and as my physical body. All because I craved an outcome for myself as I continued to want and seek for something to satisfy the direction my mind as consciousness was leading me on as.

No thanks. I no longer accept myself according to illusionary feelings/emotions that will never fill me or anyone of us up. What will assist us – in stopping the illusion that we’re missing ourselves – is to realize ourselves equal to everything here and stand up accordingly. The substances and energy I once used, only temporarily assisted me to forget my self-interested self if only just for a moment to not feel/experience what was actually going on within myself – related to my mind in avoiding facing me and having a relationship in self-honesty with me. No more hiding and fearing me – Friday Night Lights, Out.

Art By: Matti Freeman

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist and fear and deny that which I perceive and define as being negative/positive energies of my mind which I’ve used and abused in my avoidance of facing me within all that is here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist and fear and deny what I perceived and defined as being a negative energy of my mind while justifying having a positive experience of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be addicted to the energy derived from participating in illusionary pictures/ideas/memories of my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to the polarity of my mind as positive and/or negative energy while I sought/desired/craved an energetic experience of myself based on illusionary pictures/ideas and memories of my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want and/or desire to have someone or something get me out of the experience I was having of myself, instead of me taking self-responsibility for me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want and/or desire to have someone or something change the situation and/or the experience of me for me, instead of me facing me in self-honesty and taking self-responsibility for and as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to actually only be searching for that first sexual relationship of myself which was designed to entrap us as humanity to endlessly search for more in self-interest in order to contain/enslave us so that we don’t/won’t face ourselves and take self-responsibility for what is here in how our world exists in suffering, abuse and atrocity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall for the energetic cravings within my mind wherein I sought after an experience of myself where I believed I was experiencing something special when in fact the energy of the light/attention/flirting experience never lasted and was only as real as I believed it to be according to my mind as consciousness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire/crave an experience of myself as anything other than my here moment as breath as a way of getting energy to fuel my mind as consciousness and/in order for me to not stand up and take self-responsibility for abdicating myself from/as life in accepting and allowing our world to exist as it does with acts of violence as war, murder, rape and starvation.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to look for a relationship outside of myself because I didn’t have a relationship with myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I have to overcome or let go of energy instead of understanding within myself that it is to stand equal and one to energy and transcend the energetic experience through self-forgiveness and self-corrective application wherein no energetic experience remains within myself.

I commit myself to stop running from myself and to face me in self-honesty in every moment of breath in taking self-responsibility for what is here in how our world currently exists and to thus support an Equal Money System which will bring an end to energetic experiences which have resulted in abuse and death to/as our physical bodies and our physical reality.

I commit myself to understanding that energy was manifested by mind consciousness systems through friction and balance instead of self-movement in every moment as the totality of who we are – whereas no energy is required – only who we are in self-honesty moving through breath in and as self-expression in every moment of ourself here.

I commit myself to further understanding who I am in self-honesty and in stopping the conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind completely through self-forgiveness and self-corrective application wherein every moment of breath I commit myself to birth myself as life from the physical so that heaven as earth may manifest as the expression of who we are within and as oneness and equality as/for All Life

Suggest the following blogs for self-assistance and self-support:

Creation’s Journey to Life

Heaven’s Journey to Life