Archive | February 2013

Day 203: What Moves Me: Misgivings

Here I am investigating what moves me, where during my day I become aware of that which triggers an energetic reaction within and as me – to walk the point through with self-forgiveness and self-corrective/committment statements – to thus change the nature of who I am to one where I am able to breathe and direct myself to walk this life, living and making decisions – with No reactions, No movement within me – according to what’s best for all.

The Problem is: 

Ok so, we live about 12 miles from the nearest town and I’ve become very comfortable with the silence and solitude that living in the country brings.  However the past couple of years have brought an accumulation of neighbors as well as a nearby extremely Loud drilling rig. Thus, already I’m aware of how just the ‘thought’ of having neighbors again and a major corporation raping the land in our area, is in itself like pulling the trigger for irritation and ultimately self-doubt.

The fact is, I am no longer willing to react and exist as the energy surrounding such triggers, thus, I’m determined to walk the self-corrective application to let them go.

So today, when I saw that one of my neighbors brought 3 young beautful healthy horses and placed them in a pen on their land with very little hay and water, I saw how the sight of them triggered a memory I have of the owner.  Again I see how money is a factor and motivator in my decision of becoming who I am. The memory consists of a beLIEf where according to an image within my mind I mistake what I’ve ‘heard’ said about them to be a fact.  I remember my other neighbor saying that the people who one this particular land, that ‘they apparently have a little bit of money’.

That ‘thought’ holds no actual fact, but nevertheless it triggers more backchat and internal conversation;  ”What kind of people put horses on their land and then just leave them there alone with no shelter from the harsh weather”.  The energy in just one particular line of thought participation triggers another and is enough to cause anyone to go into a full blown mind possession.

From there I go further into imagining and projecting my fears, telling myself how there’s not enough room for them to move around, and, with no shelter from the weather, one can see why one would begin to question if the horses are being adequately cared for.   Then, it snows, and I watched as the horses huddle together as the temperature drops below freezing.

I began to see how this particular point within myself has various levels of self-doubt, self-apprehension, spite, ego and of course fear.

Within and as it, my expectations of ‘what is right’ and ‘what is wrong’ are all over the place and I project my own self-doubt onto my neighbors, even though I have no idea who they are, nor do I have any idea how to care for horses in cold weather.  Determined to stop myself as the movement of energies surrounding this point, I breathe and continue to investigate.

The Solution

Having stopped my participation in and as the back chat and internal conversations, I began to educate myself with regards to how to take care of Horses during cold weather.  Immediately all of the backchat, internal conversations and energy within this point stopped.  Because once I understood the details and proper care the delusion I was accepting and allowing didn’t have a leg to stand on, so to speak.

I was able to then direct and assist myself through applying self-forgiveness and self-corrective application – to stop the pattern of ego, spite, backchat and internal conversations, judgments and opinions, as well as the fear I existed as within it..

In Addition, this point has assisted me to further realize the importance of Equal Money Capitalism,  where All Living Beings will Always be Provided and cared for according to what’s Best for All.

Reward:

No more Misgivings. I was able to recognize that the horses in question ARE being properly cared for and that all of my conclusions were obsessions/delusions – me reaching to experience myself within and as the energy of/as it. When I became clear within myself I was able to see my neighbors clear and see that the horses are doing well.

I am beginning to understand and trust myself within the meaning of ‘give as you’d like to receive’, to we walk together as a Living Example of what it is to assist and support each other according to What’s best for All.

No matter what. Everybody is Provided for… Nobody freezes and/or starves to death. Everybody has that which they require to experience a Dignified Life.

6 Components of Cold Weather Horse Care

Cold Weather Horse Care Tips

A Must Read: Day 306: Encryption of the System of Self

Investigate Equal Money Capitalism…

Misgivings1

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within polarty cycles of fear of self-trapped by the fear of change and the fear of choice, all of which is just fear of self because self create all of reality – either directly or through what we accept and allow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my entire beLIEf system to be motivated and moved energetically by Money, where I accept and allow value to be placed upon Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto a beLIEf according to an image within my mind that consists of gossip – where I heard someone say that so and so ‘apparently have a little bit of money’ and within that thoughtI became the fear that I exist as in terms of my own survival – where money, or rather the lack of it sets the value and determines my place in society.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the LIE of Ego where ‘self’ is all that matters, because as the object of my own thoughts, I give attention to myself in/as self-interest – religion of self – instead of taking self-responsibility and directing myself according to what’s best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to reach for conclusions in my ‘place of comfort’, where I blame others for how I experienced myself as having a negative attitude.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself go into my mind and participate in thoughts of what is ‘Right/Good’ and/or ‘Bad/Wrong’ and make decisions according to and as that.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find fault in others where I become complacent and thus find fault in other’s as a way of ignoring my own self-doubt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a nervous energy, uneasy and fearful that something might happen and thus I become apprehensive and exist in fear my own misgivings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be apprehensive to communicate with others and thus I remain stuck in my mind of ‘what if‘s’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ‘set in my ways’ where I accept and allow who I am to be determined according to my past as my memories/behaviors/personalities and characters through which I judge others as myself and fail to recognize what I am seeing as my own self-judgment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear stopping who I am as my imagination and thus when I ‘feel’ inconvenienced, it’s because my past projection of myself is being threatened – the one where I pictured my reality and my life being lived ‘a certain way’ – ‘pie in the sky’ dreams which were nothing more than thoughts in my own head of desires based in and as self-interest and greed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept the feeling of believing myself as being inconvenienced by the actions or reactions of others and in failing to recognize myself within the uneasiness / movement within me as the inconvenience that I exist as in how I separate myself from others according to a value system that I’ve existed as and thus have accepted and allowed, where within our world we are the have’s and the have not’s and we support life accordingly by placing a price tag on the very necessities for life – as those that our Earth provides Equally for Everybody.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the misgivings of “maybe this isn’t what it looks like” or “I don’t like this situation”.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look away and say nothing about the pain, misfortune and death that I see is forced upon those who have little to no money, because as such, they are seen to have little to no value/worth within our current world/money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to reject others according to that which I’ve rejected and denied within myself as the point of taking self-responsibility.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself existing in/as a point of energy, where for example I become moved by the mistreatment of animals, I stop, I breathe.  I see, realize and understand that I have denied standing up and taking self-responsibility for and as them, thus, I commit myself to the decision to assist and support and change who I am from the inside out to one who that is willing to become a living example of what it is to live life according to what’s best for all and I commit myself to educating myself within any giving moment that requires that I do so.

I commit myself to when and as I see movement within me as energy in relation to a point where I judge others through backchat and internal conversations – which strokes my own ego in believing that I can or would be able to do a better job of taking care of something or someone than they are – I stop, I breathe. I see, realize and understand that it is my own misgivings of self that I am existing as, thus, I commit myself to walk the self-corrected application – to stop participation in thoughts, internal conversations and backchat – to instead educate myself about my world, to be willing to Stand Self-Responsible for and as All living beings to manifest Heaven on Earth.

I commit myself to stop searching for an experience as a reason to place a price tag on life.

MisgivingsI commit myself to see, realize and understand that Life here on Earth can and Will change because I am willing to walk the steps necessary that ensure Heaven is Life on Earth.

I commit myself to cross reference myself to be able to Stand within the Principal of/as What’s Best for All and so is best for me.

“From Good/Right and Bad/Wrong to – ‘What’s Best for All’. Whenever one face a moment, relationship – and one find one’s Mind go into ‘this is Right/Good’ and/or ‘Bad/Wrong’, to in the moment change the cross-reference to: Does that stand within the Principle of/as What’s Best for All, and so Best for me or Not? With the ‘Not’ in fact meaning – will this Decision/Direction produce CONSEQUENCE as compromise in me/my relationship to others, or will this bring forth a Solution and/or how can I structure the Decision/Direction into and as an equal and one Solution for me and/or all involved?” Sunette Spies ~ Heaven’s Journey to Life: LIFE-Regulation Practicality (Part Three): DAY 308

Suggested blogs to follow:
Creation Journey to Life
Heaven Journey to Life
Earth Journey to Life
Economist Journey to Life

Join the forum:
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Day 201 & 202: Like Mother, Like Daughter

My youngest daughter moved back in with us on December 20th of last year, 2012. It had been almost 5 years since the last time she lived with us, which was the first time she moved back home after moving out right after she passed her GED just months before her 18th birthday, almost 2 years prior.  To “The Anti-Reader Personality”, that minute detail will more than likely be extremely unimportant. However, it is undoubtedly an important point for one to consider when one is unravelling and deconstructing the multiple upon multiple personalities and characters that one have existed as during such a time frame.

I mean, our past is always here for us to forgive and walk through.  Instead real change never occurs,  we continue repeating the same cycles of patterns and behaviors –  which are actually just different forms of self-abuse.

Before I began applying the tools provided through Desteni I Process, I wouldn’t have been able to see such points to forgive and become able to walk them through to release through such a practical and giving application.

We all know how ill our emotional patterns with family can leave us feeling and experiencing ourselves within our life.  Where with just the right tone and specific words spoken,  suddenly,  some forgotten, yet familiar backchat and internal conversation returns.  When that happens we  have two choices: we can either become energetically charged as an automated response pattern/ reaction – which only serves to take us further into our mind and back to the way we were, are, and have always been – stuck in emotional turmoil and personal self-avoidance. Or, we can see such moments as the gift that they are and within that who self really is and how vital it really is to slow oneself down and breathe.

What I’ve noticed is how easy it is to want to hurry and when we hurry we’re not breathing. When we’re not breathing, who we are as our mind slips into automation, old patterns, and here specifically, the mother/ daughter design construct. It’s like re-reading the same book or re-watching the same movie over and over and expecting something new or different to happen every time.

So I’m realizing that I am capable of redesigning who I am and that I can direct myself according to what’s best for all, because when I get a glimpse of myself in self-honesty, I become aware of the importance of releasing the never-ending cycles of generations upon generations of strife – as that which we’ve all existed as. And, I realize it’s going to require a willingness to ‘Let-go’, to thus give back to myself that which I’m willing to forgive myself of through redesigning  who I am from within to without.  To once-and-for-all Stop the past patterns of me as my mind that I have existed as within the mother/daughter relationship construct and to begin to actually walk this Journey to Life in/as the shoes of another.  Thus I will begin here in keeping it simple.
Like Mother Like Daughter
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being specific and for how the very meaning of specificity and becoming it in walking my process makes my entire body want to squirm and tense up and retreat thus, I commit myself to slowing myself down and giving me to me as the gift of seeing and hearing and remaining aware of me from the inside out as me as my physical body and mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having negative thoughts and for seeking positive thoughts as a way of deceiving myself into an alternate reality of feel good that actually only exists within my mind and in separation of what is actually here within and as me as my physical world/reality/body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to reach for pretty pictures within my mind in an attempt to avoid experiencing the negative energetic charge that I often felt as a mother during those times when I was sure that I would fail, that I wouldn’t have the Courage to Not become what I beLIEved everyone wanted and needed me to be according to the picture image within my mind within and as the memories I have stored of the relationship between my mother and me and her mother and hers and so on for generation after generation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to keep score within myself in a way that triggers me to compare myself to other people’s behaviors, where I teeter back and forth between superiority and inferiority using opinions as definitions within which to remain stuck in a belief system of what is ‘right’ and what is ‘wrong’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hang onto memories that manifest emotional physical pain within and as my physical body because I fear that  I won’t know what to do if I forgive myself and let them go.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to argue for my limitations wherein I believe that I am the best that I can be and thus have accepted my life and my world as it is as less than giving because giving life Equally to all is determined only through laboring oneself day in and day out in order to earn money for one’s right to survive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in backchat and internal conversations of: ‘Oh no, not again, I can’t do this,  and I don’t want to’ because I see, realize and understand that in doing so I am instructing myself to change accordingly, thus telling myself that it’s alright to excuse, justify and give myself reason to remain existing as the very thoughts that continue to enslave me in and as ego, discontent and ultimately self-loathing and playing blame games.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to anticipate myself in a crisis mode so much so that I experience a sort of separation anxiety within my physical body to the extent that I physically manifest pain surrounding the area of my upper back and into my chest and heart area.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself as consciousness by arguing for my own limitation where through reacting instead of directing I restrict myself  from actually changing who and what I am and how I live, thus limiting myself from actually living the solutions that will ultimately assist us in changing the nature of who we are as Limitation.

I commit myself to slowing myself down, to breathing and investigating who I am in specificity and clarity as I deconstruct who I am within and as the mother/daughter relationship.
peas in a pod
I commit myself to embrace the specificity of details through walking my process of self-forgiveness.

I commit myself to see, realize and understand that it’s OK to Forgive myself and let-go during those moments when I see that I am hanging onto the emotional and physical pain that exists as a memory within and as me as my physical body.

I commit myself to stop keeping score.

I commit myself to stop comparing myself to others based upon judgment within the ‘belief’ that there’s a difference between their behavior and mine in that my behavior is right and their behavior is wrong, when in fact there is no right or wrong way to act because that would mean that life can never be anything but a competition, a role playing, an act, when the facts remain clear in that we all exist here together on this Earth, which for me is proof that the Principle of Equality exists here with us as the very Nature of who we are within and as our Physical Body/World/Reality/Existence.

I commit myself to stop and breathe and walk the corrective application in correcting who I am as my mind of patterns and constructs that exists between my daughter and me within and as the mother/child relationship to one that resembles what it is to give as you would like to receive, to thus inevitably change the nature of self as self walks as a living example of what it is to exist within a world where All relationships become Agreements that will support Life to reach it’s fullest potential as Heaven on Earth according to the Principle of Equality.

I commit myself to stop participating in the backchat and internal conversations that I have become aware of with regards to my daughter because I see, realize and understand that when I participate, I am actually arguing for my limitations and instead I breathe and direct myself to walk this point through in self-corrective application.

I commit myself to stop accepting and allowing myself to go into crisis mode because I see, realize and understand that doing so is an energetic boost similar to what a vampire would do in that it sucks the life out of everyone and everything. I commit myself to accept and allow myself the opportunity to stop and breathe.

I commit myself to remaining aware of the fact that within every moment of breath is the opportunity to redesign who I am as my Physical/Mind/Body according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to really communicating with others without having other mind processes activating while I am in their presence and to really hear what they’re saying/expressing.

I commit myself to redesigning myself into a human being who is able to express oneself without demeaning and undermining others in the process.

“Place yourself in the shoes of another, and make sure you are Willing to Live That Life.” Bernard Poolman

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Suggest Hearing:

Parenting – Perfecting the Human Race – Part 1 

Parenting – Perfecting the Human Race – Part 2

Parenting – Perfecting the Human Race – Part 3

Suggested blogs to follow:
Creation Journey to Life
Heaven Journey to Life
Earth Journey to Life
Economist Journey to Life

Join the forum:
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Investigate Equal Money Capitalism

Day 200: Predictive Programming: Killing Machines

killing machines
The Problem:

I was watching a movie last night and there was this scene that flashed real quickly showing 2 men on fire and then suddenly both were shot in the head. Just this evening I’m sitting here talking with my 2 1/2 year old granddaughter and I hear extremely loud machine gun sounds coming from the bedroom where her father was playing a video game where the object is to kill people using high powered and loud automatic simulated machine guns. All I could think of in both instances was: Predictive Programming.

The question is, how come we’re not asking ourselves why and how it is that we’re OK with occupying our senses and our imagination with the sounds and moving pictures where we become killing machines? How come we’re not taking self-responsibility for the violence that we accept and allow to be put into movies and video games and for the fact that our children are being taught how to become it?  How come we’re not concerned with our own lack of parenting and communication skills?

What is the intent of this kind of predictive programming? Definitely profit, and the means to Desensitize us, to convince us that war is OK and that the Nature of the human cannot change…

“Desensitization also refers to reduced responsiveness to actual violence caused by exposure to violence in the media.[8] Desensitization may arise from different sources of media including TV, video games and movies. Violence can prime thoughts of hostility with the possibility of affecting the way we perceive others and interpret their actions.[9] Research shows that initial exposure to violence in the media produces a number of aversive responses such as increased heart rate, fear, discomfort, perspiration and disgust. However, studies conducted show that prolonged and repeated exposure to violence in the media reduces or habituates the initial psychological impact until violent images do not elicit these negative responses. Eventually the observer becomes emotionally and cognitively desensitized to media violence. In an experiment to determine the effects on violent video games causing physiological desensitization to real-life violence, participants played either a violent or non-violent video game for 20 minutes. After that, they watched a 10 minute video containing real-life violence while their heart rate and galvanic skin responses were being monitored. The participants who played violent video games previously to watching the video showed lower heart rate and galvanic skin response readings compared to those who had not played violent video games displaying a physiological desensitization to violence.” Wikipedia

 

Is it possible we’ve already forgotten about the Sandy Hook massacre?

Is it possible that human nature can change? Yes.

The Solution:

We change our predictive programming. The entertainment industry is one of the most massive money makers that exist within our world today. Thus we already have the infrastructure in place for us as a humanity to change the nature of entertainment to one with a program that is best for all always. And, why would every parent accept their child to be taught anything less than to become the best human possible? We all know that we’re programmed in numerous ways where the outcome for the human is set to the tune of profit and greed and as a result, we’re literally creating our own extinction. It’s time to get real with a practical solution and one that Equal Money Capitalism will offer in a world where everyone’s basic living needs will always be taken care of.

The Reward:

We stop benefiting from the death of Life. We stop war and we stop killing. We become the best we can be because we are no longer putting a price tag on expressing and living and giving and receiving. We begin to for the first time hear and communicate effectively with our children where they know without a doubt that we see them, we hear them and we protect them. We become a living example of how the human Can Stop thoughts – which fuel emotions and feelings, which up till now have manifested and created the worst possible consequences – to one that supports life according to what’s best for All.

————

Suggested blogs to follow:
Creation Journey to Life
Heaven Journey to Life
Earth Journey to Life
Economist Journey to Life

Join the forum:
Desteni

Investigate Equal Money Capitalism

Day 199: Finding Fault becomes a case of Moral Dilemma

Here are Self-Forgiveness and Self-Commitment statements for a pattern I am correcting that I have become aware of as I have caught myself reacting towards my daughter and my partner.

moral high ground
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that finding fault in myself and others as myself is a case of existing in and as a Moral Dilemma.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself in and as fear to seek and find fault in others and for not seeing, realizing and understanding how in doing so I am existing in and as and remaining within a mindset of being concerned with the principles of right and wrong/polarity, like living the long arm of the law of ethical and/or moral attitudes.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project onto the people within my life energetic dilemma’s wherein I create situations that push them to a point of requiring a choice between equally undesirable alternatives/moral dilemma’s and within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience an energetic experience of feeling powerful and/or better than.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an idea within myself according to an image which I use like a tool of protection against others wherein I justify myself as having perfected myself according to that which I’m demanding of another and within that I manipulate an experience of myself according to fear of loss and develop myself in such a way that I will then manipulate/reel in my partner and/or a family member into my experience of myself within and as a negative experience at which time we will both then begin to fear each other and then, I use that against myself and them in that I utilize the experience as a form of denial where I shut down and withdraw into myself in and as anger and resentment and within that not realizing that this is how I continue to support enslavement of myself and others as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the connection between my initial fear reaction and in how I take a image/thought from that and use my imagination to take the negative experience of myself to a positive experience – where I go from hopelessness to power, because in doing so I see myself as being ‘more than’ – instead of living an example of self change from the mind to the physical to stop projecting self within and as a euphoria where I see myself as more and within that projecting expectations of my false sense of perfection onto others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find fault in the actions of others and thus react to them through using words and tonality within my voice to project judgment and fear onto them as a way of attempting to manipulate and control.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the tightness within my upper chest and back area as a warning sign of discomfort within and as my physical body informing me that I’m existing in self-interest motivated by and as fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become detached from other people where in fear I feel the need to protect myself from any and all chance that I might loose them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ride an energetic tidal wave of sorts wherein I ignore seeing, realizing and understanding the possible and / or inevitable physical consequences that have and may occur as a result of accepting and allowing self to be fueled by the fire of self-interest, greed, spite and the attempt to use, abuse and control others.

I commit myself to stop finding fault in others and to instead walk in the shoes of another, to provide equal and one support as I would wish to be supported in life.

I commit myself to breathe and remain aware of, to thus stop the pattern within my mind where I secretly find fault in those I’m living with which manifests an environment of abuse and neglect and thus inhibits my ability to remain committed to walking and becoming a living example of living life according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to stop existing within the mindset of of right and wrong polarities, to stop living like the long arm of the law of ethical and/or moral attitudes.

I commit myself to stop projecting a negative/inferior energetic experience onto others as a means of manifesting a positive/superior experience of/for myself.

I commit myself to question the value that I have given to a way of thinking and believing that there is value in the polarity equations of right and wrong, and to see, realize and understand that as a Society, it is our Responsibility to let go of any and all belief systems that do not support Life according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to stop living who I am along side the road of taking the ‘moral high ground’, because I see, realize and understand that that in itself is taking a road that has proven to have no value whatsoever, as it has not and does not provide a solution that supports all Life Equally, therefore, I commit myself to the Solution of Equality – an Equal Money Capitalistic System, wherein Life is living according to what’s best for All.