Tag Archive | science

Day 124: Hit and Miss

Today, my biological father called me. A man who I’ve barely known, yet, when I was young, I craved for and sought after his attention. He lives about 125 miles from me and I rarely if ever talk to or see him. Tomorrow is his birthday, he’ll be 75. He called to tell me that he is not doing very well and doesn’t believe he’ll be here much longer. We had a nice conversation and he handles himself with curiosity when I don’t agree with his belief in God and, he even agrees that Equal Money is the Solution for this World, though doesn’t see how we’ll ever get everyone to stop their greed to implement it.

I asked him after 75 years on this earth – what has he realized about himself, free from his beliefs. He admitted he had no idea how to answer that and then added how he’d lived a pretty decent life and that he guessed that was all one could ask for… Yes. I’m familiar with that point of acceptance that he spoke of, and I’m no longer willing to allow myself to be that.

When I hung up the phone, I saw how I longed for the days when all of my family was still here. I heard the backchat of thoughts within my mind reminding me how within the past year I’ve lost my brother, my sister and now my biological father is, as he put it, “on his last leg.” I wanted to just sit and reminisce about what used to be. However, I didn’t. I stopped. I breathed, and in self-honesty, I saw how my mind was looking for a feeling that a long time ago, I believed was me. I no longer accept that. Instead, I wrote the following self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to hold onto the urge to reminisce within a pattern of what looks to me to be one that I would describe as a ‘hit and miss’ – meaning: it’s like looking through dozens of photos and hoping to find one that is recognizable – wherein I have accepted and allowed myself to long for what used to be within a belief that was never real and how within my perception of and as my mind I dreamed of what could have been, thus existing within the hope for a relationship with a father that begins and ends within ‘dreams of what if’, within a memory/character of and as my mind – which was preprogrammed and downloaded into me from/of and as the mind of my parents, and the generations that have gone before me, thus, I forgive myself for not realizing that in the ‘miss’ I become the ‘hit’ that I perceive myself as, as that which I long for within a feeling to be special by a man that I never really knew, and within that, I forgive myself for not realizing that when I reminisce, I am basically sleeping with my eyes open, just like one does in REM sleep, wherein we ‘dream‘ about ourselves within our mind as elaborate storylines all the while ignoring what is real as our physical body and our physical reality, and, I forgive myself for not realizing that when I reminisce of/for what used to be, but wasn’t, and/or when I ‘reminisce’ for that which I never had in order to feel/experience that which I feared in the first place, how within that, I am actually using feeling and emotional energy charges to supply myself with what appears to be a reliever of stress, when actually, it creates stress unto my physical body while I ignore a point of suppression and where I’m adding fuel to the fire by creating scenarios within my mind to distract from facing responsibility for myself and for my world, thus depleting me as my physical body within the acceptance of that which isn’t real as the thoughts that suck the life from me as my physical body/flesh and bone through my own participation within/as and during the madness of reminiscing in and as my mind as consciousness, therefore, I forgive myself for the desire to escape to the past within and as my mind as the memories/characters thereof and thus live my past as my future as the here within this moment.

When and as I see myself longing and reminiscing for/of what never was, and/or what used to be, of/as what is ‘now the past’, I stop. I breathe. I see, realize and understand that the past is over and to participate within and as my mind of/as memories/characters, is to accept death unto me as my physical body where I cycle within the same patterns, lies, pain and false sense of security that I’ve always existed as. I am No longer willing to accept and allow the direction of and as my mind as consciousness. Instead I commit myself to direct me as my mind in self-honesty.

When and as I see myself existing within the desire to escape into and as my mind as the memories/characters of and as my past, I stop. I breathe and I realize that in every moment of breath I have the choice to decide to remain here breathing within and as what is real as my physical body and my physical reality or I can choose to participate within and as my mind which is exactly how and what is killing our physical bodies and physical reality, and I have realized this because I have proved this to/for myself, thus, I see, realize and understand the common sense in stopping and being the directive principle of me and through self-corrective application stopping that which is/has been the deadly game of life within and as humanity enslaved to a world/money system within cycles of abuse and death.

I commit myself to let go of/stop reminiscing within cycles of/as memories/character as how abuse is manifested/created against life.

I commit myself to breathe and move the energy through me and ground myself here within and as what is real as my physical flesh and earth.

I commit myself to show how together as a Group, we can manifest Heaven on Earth where All life is experienced in/as dignity according to what’s best for All.

Day 117: The Right to Die

Tears of desperate locked-in syndrome sufferer Tony Nicklinson as High Court rules he CAN’T ask a doctor to end his life – –

The above article is about a 58-year-old father of two who is mentally sound but paralyzed from the neck down and unable to speak. For two years he’s been battling to persuade three judges of the High Court to rule that if and when he decides he wants to die, that doctors will be immune from prosecution if they help him to do so. Recently, he lost in his war for ‘the right’ to end his life.

His wife said her husband was ‘absolutely heartbroken’ because he’s been condemned by the law to ‘a life of increasing indignity and misery’.

It’s a strange thing to read, that someone is ‘fighting’ the laws of our current world/money system for the right to end one’s life so that they won’t have to suffer a life of ‘indignity and misery’. Because obviously, the laws of our current world/money system have already denied ‘the right for All to be able to live a life in dignity’ – where 30,000 plus children die a miserable death every single day from starvation.

Who the hell cares about their indignity and misery? They’re starving to death! They don’t have the luxury of a two year court battle to survive life.

There is something here we had better grasp – that how we experience ourselves within our world, is by our own creation as consciousness, which we agree to and manifest within our world accordingly.

Like it or not – we’re All responsible for how every single one of us experience life, whether that be through the suffering/misery resulting from having a stroke or the daily shocking statistics of 30,000 + children starving to death.

If there’s misery, pain, suffering, anguish and suppression amongst us, where one wishes they would die but are unable to – that is what it is as a direct result of our current world/money system. It’s time for us to realize that ALL challenges we face are according to what I / WE have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become.

The Question is – what have we accepted and allowed ourselves to become?

For Life on Earth to actually change – where No one suffers and every single life is given equal support and assistance according to individual needs – that require us to stop who we are in/as self-interest, ego and greed.

In order to provide effective life support according to what’s best for self, requires a system where we come together as a group, to take self-responsibility and support a world/money system according to what’s best for All.

There is ONLY ONE solution where peaceful change is possible, that is through an Equal Money System.

I commit myself to comprehend completely for myself to thus show how one cannot escape facing/forgiving self – because even in death self must take self-responsibility for Self as Life as All in All ways Equally.

I commit myself to Never stop supporting an Equal Money System which will provide All living beings with The Right to Experience LIFE in DIGNITY.

I commit myself to show how an Equal Money System will allow each one of us the ability to clarify and redefine ourselves through self-directed choices of/as self-responsibility for and as All Living beings.

I commit myself to show how with an Equal Money System, the Right of Life will give each individual being the right to exist in dignity in/as Heaven on Earth – where fighting to live and die will not be a battle nor even a QUESTion within the minds of men.

I commit myself to show how life within an Equal Money System will replace struggling to survive to that of Harmony Amongst Neighbors.

I commit myself to Life in Equality as Heaven on Earth wherein ego, greed and self-interest become obsolete as expressions.

I commit myself to Life in Equality as Heaven on Earth where Equal Money will pave the way for Peace and a Dignified Life for All.

Day 108: Make Them Earn Their Keep

Foreign prisoners cost taxpayers £430m a year… just to keep them locked up – –

This is a comment someone posted below the above article: “Make them earn their keep, or is that too obvious?” –

I can remember a couple of times saying something similar – thus the following self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support a world/money system that limits resource availability to the people of the land based on profit, where the greedy take from the needy and use the excuse of ‘make them earn their keep’ as a way of keeping their own self-absorbed lifestyle intact – instead of realizing that what is provided unto us from/as our Sun, Earth and Water, is in Keep for All Living beings, to see to it that the experience of life may become a living expression of Heaven on Earth for All – Not just for some.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within and as the words: “make them earn their keep”, not seen, realized and understood that when I accept life according to one’s earnings, then I’m allowing life lived in/as yearnings – a desire for that which I seek but never attain.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how when I as a character of/as my mind, demand that another ‘earn their keep’ – what I am actually saying is that I ‘feel’ betrayed by our current world/money system and, I Fear every day that I’m Not going to have enough money to feed myself and my family, thus within and as my Fear, I become characters in/of defense – as a way of protecting myself from my own fear – wherein I go to war against my fellow beings – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding, that it is I who Decides what I accept and allow to exist as our current world/money system, and, that it is My responsibility to change that which is broken, and I see, realize and understand that our current world/money system is broken, thus, instead of blaming and shaming and demanding the continuance of a world where people must ‘Earn their keep’ – I stop. I Breathe. I Commit myself to Stand up and Support All Life according to what’s best for All, because I see, realize and understand how when I GIVE LIFE unto another, I RECEIVE LIFE unto and as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to manipulate myself and others through guilt and fear within the beLIEf that life is about ‘earning our keep’ and within that I forgive myself that I have never questioned that which I accepted – that life is something that must be earned otherwise one is not deserving of life – instead, in self-honesty, I see, realize and understand that such a beLIEf only serves the purpose of supporting the rich and enslaving the rest – thus I stop. I breathe. I Commit myself to investigating an Equal Money System as The Solution that will Save the World.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the beLIEf that life is about ‘earning one’s keep’, because I see, realize and understand that when I walk in the shoes of another, I see, realize and understand that I / We don’t require a ‘keeper’ nor do I / We require to be ‘kept’ – what I / We require is a practical living solution that equally supports who we are as LIFE as our Physical Bodies within and as our Physical Reality, and to provide All living beings with the ability to create an environment that is safe, supportive, comfortable and effective.

Day 51: Longing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to long to be part of something and at the same time not know what that something is and simultaneously fearing whatever that something may be, thus, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create a simulation within my mind for the appearance of myself as having temporarily fulfilled the ‘longing’ within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not realize in self-honesty that it is intimacy (in-to-me-i-see), that I am longing for when I feel as if I’m suppose to hold onto something or someone or as if I’m leaving someone or something behind – it is only me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to associate longing with believing that I must seek out my longing through an experience of falling in love when in actuality I see/realize and understand that it’s in the search that I long.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my longing began as a young child wanting to be closer to my mom and dad but experiencing inner conflict and fear of not knowing whether I might be imposing on them for my being there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to throughout my life, experience constant internal conflict of wanting to be a part of something but also fearing I was imposing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate myself from life living a definition of self as an imposter thus hiding within my mind in self-deception.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that in the illusion as energy I attempt to define myself and when the energy runs out I feel lost again in longing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to long to be like everyone else and within that Not realizing that I already am.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as the one who always got left behind, when in reality what was happening was me existing in CONcern for my mind as thoughts, feelings and fears for how I was experiencing myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the relationship connections formed in this world as myself with others is an illusion and that that which I have experienced in this world, with regards to love and relationships and feelings of any and all kind, have not actually been real, and that all that is important is who I am as me here in self-honesty according to what’s best for all,

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe, live, and become the words ‘dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing’, where within that I solidified my own illusion and abdicated myself from life itself.

When and as I see myself longing within a feeling of wanting to be a part of something and / or someone, I stop. I breathe. I accept and commit myself to release myself from the state of mind as longing.

When and as I see myself longing and lingering within a feeling of imposing, I stop. I breathe. I see/realize and understand that as I remain aware of me here breathing and directing myself through self-forgiveness in self-honesty – the imposter as me stops.

I commit myself to remaining aware of who I am in and as longing and to purify my mind as the word longing through self-forgiveness and self-correction and self-directive application.

I commit myself in self-honesty to through breathing Stop lingering within feelings of imposing.

I commit myself in self-honesty to Stop me as an imposter.

I commit myself to Stop me as longing, in realizing that what I long for is me supporting me in self-honesty supporting life according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to through daily writing and self-forgiveness, to face me in self-honesty as I peel away and release the layers of self through Self-Corrective Application – to Release and bring to the Point of Nothingness All and Everything Not in Service to Life in Every Way.

I commit myself to realizing that it is only as a group coming together as one that we will as a humanity have the opportunity to change what is here in creating Heaven on Earth, where through an Equal Money system we Will eventually bring an end to our current longing for living life as an illusion creating our reality in war, poverty and starvation and thus breeds murder and rape upon our children, ourselves and our land, thus we will Stand together, til it is done and we’re All standing Equal and One.

Day 24: Waiting on the World to Change

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe myself as being misunderstood wherein I’ve walked the path of the middle road claiming myself to be waiting on the world to change when actually I was hiding in fear of who I am within how the world exists and in my own self-denial remained quietly waiting for someone to somehow come and save me and/or show me ‘the way’, instead of realizing who I am in self-honesty and taking self-responsibility within all that is here.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to stand with those I called my friends in their waiting for the world to change simply because I as them wanted/needed someone to agree with what was actually a disapproval of self and thus we validated one to/from the other the same as we existed as, in and as dishonesty to/towards self in the denial of self and an abdication of/to and/as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed in my conformity to/as and within our money/world system to stand for nothing and believed myself as having no ability to ever be able to stand and become accountable and self-responsible for what is being accepted and allowed within our money/world system.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to gather in a work place environment and settle into the rules as I walked the line in agreement with others and silently resented my place in the matrix as I stood in separation of/as it, instead of seeing/realizing and understanding that it’s not about ‘fighting’ the system, it’s about facing who I am within and as the system and changing who I am in self-honesty and directing myself equal and one to/towards an actual physical self-corrective change in order to support and ensure a quality of life in Equality for and as All living beings.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to claim to see everything that is going ‘wrong’ within this world and those who lead it when in fact I didn’t have a real clue how everything that is existing within this world as the crime, abuse, starvation, war and murder begins with money/profit and greed.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to take pride in saying that I see how fucked up the world is, yet I accepted myself to be the feelings of fear I experienced, which I used as an excuse to say that I didn’t have the means to rise above and beat how our current money/world systems exist, when in fact there is nothing to ‘beat’, there is only common sense in seeing that how the world exists is accepting and allowing a minority to live in luxury while the majority support, accept and allow them to do so while millions suffer and/or starve to death.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to keep on waiting and waiting for the world to change because I couldn’t/wouldn’t face the fact that the world will never change until I first forgive myself and begin to face me in self-honesty, wherein I make the decision to stand up and change me from within and as such I stop the direction of my mind and I direct myself as my mind in the decision to only accept and allow a world/money system which supports that which is best for all.

Quote From Creation’s Journey to Life Blog

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the poor instead of realizing that the poor represent the part of us that wants and seeks to have more than our neighbor.

I forgive myself for the times that I said if I had the power I’d bring my neighbor home from the battle ground so that they would have never missed a moment living the death in/as/of war, instead I see/realize and understand that war exists within our outside world because of the war raging within us in our not hearing our self-honesty for us to stop and forgive ourselves and thus forgive and support each other to create a world which is best for all.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to trust the television and commercials bending the mind as consciousness in ways to enslave, wherein humanity walks about as dumbed down energy seekers looking for a ‘good time’ all the while time is running out and information is all we’ve ever got, instead of actually living a life of self-realization through and as an honesty within self where self-trust begins wherein self sees/realizes and understands that for one to live fully and actually free, all life must first be supported according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to profess I care and that the fight isn’t fair and so I just sat around waiting and waiting, instead of realizing that we must first care to see who we are within what we say isn’t fair, and in seeing we forgive what we’ve avoided seeing in fear and we see in self-honesty that to really care is to give to another that which self would like to receive and thus we stand as one man, one vote in support of an Equal Money System because in our giving what’s best for all to all living beings we will never be found lacking.

Art By: Ann Van Den Broeck

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to get drunk and/or high and blame others for the guilt and helplessness I felt within myself for how our world punishes those who are barely surviving our mone/world system – instead of realizing that through self-forgiveness I am able to see in self-honesty who I’m able to be standing in self-trust and supporting a system of equality which supports that which is best for all.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that it’s hard to beat the system and as such stood at/as a distance/separate, waiting for the world to change, when in fact, in wanting to ‘beat’ the system we’re actually only wanting to ‘beat’ ourselves, because we are the system and we’re only actually waiting on ourselves to stand up and stop what we’re accepting and allowing to/from as our world/money systems, and waiting on ourself to face who we are within our current money/world system, thus we forgive ourselves and we see/realize and understand that when we forgive ourselves, we see/realize and understand that there is no one else to forgive, there is only life here to support and as such we stand up as one man, one vote in support of an Equal Money System, which will be the beginning in creating Heaven on Earth.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe we’re actually free within this world when all the while I pretended daily to be a multiple of personalities, a personality for work/survival, a personality when I had money, and a different one when I was broke just to name a few thus realizing that when money is given to all equally only then will everyone actually be free to be who we are within every moment of breath, the same yesterday and today, equal and one as all here.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that one day some generation is going to rule the population so we just keep waiting and waiting and thus we’ve not seen that we are who we’re waiting on and thus there is no more time for waiting for the world to change when the change we’re waiting on rests within our own self-honest self-direction according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to no longer waiting on the world to change when in fact change begins first within myself in forgiving myself and in self-honesty directing myself in self-corrective application so that I may bring awareness that life has been abdicated to self-interest and greed and that to stop abdication to life is to stop the direction of and as the conscious mind and to direct self according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to pushing myself to assure that everyone is allowed an education so that we can stop the grips of paid information which has dumbed us down as a humanity for the purpose of a few to live in luxury while the majority slave, support and/or suffer and die needlessly.

I commit myself to forgiving myself for what I’ve accepted and allowed in how I’ve been directed and fell into the trap of/as the mind as consciousness and furthermore, I take self-responsibility in stopping and beginning in this moment of breath in trusting myself to see and realize and direct myself in supporting and creating a world according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to understanding in self-honesty who I am and how our world exists within every relationship I/We exist in and to thus support myself and each other to be be able to understand our past so that we can change the future in and as our relationships.