Tag Archive | Salvation Army

Day 260: Mother/Child Relationship Commitment

For Context Please Read:

Day 258: Facing Emotional Suppression

Day 259: Forgiving Holding-on

When and as I see myself wanting to hold on to something and/or someone within an illusion in my mind where I have believed that the nature of abuse within the relationship will forever remain, I stop. Instead I breathe, I see, realize and understand that my mind fears losing the relationship because I have formed a pattern of and as it through my acceptance, when in reality, I am aware that I AM able to change the nature of who I am as the abuse to one that honors All Life unconditionally, equally as one.

I commit myself to stop participating when I see myself wanting to hold on to the specific mother/daughter connection/relationship that I have with my daughter/children in order to solidify who I’ve been within and as superiority because I see, realize and understand that the power of control I’ve demanded over my children has only created a restraint upon their self expression as well as my own. I commit myself to Stop.

I commit myself to direct myself to stop who I am as anger and spite because I see, realize and understand that to remain acting as such is a total disregard for life itself and I realize that I’m not actually angry at anyone or anything but myself, that I’m actually angry and spiteful within for how and what I’ve accepted and allowed myself to be and become in my mind in total disregard for who I am as my physical body and for the consequences that doing so creates within and as my world/physical body and reality.

I commit myself to Stop reacting in cycles of abusive patterns of reaction to/towards my daughter/children because I see, realize and understand that I am aware of when the anger rises from within my solar plexus and I understand that I have that moment in breath where I can direct myself to change the very nature of the relationship to one that is supportive, giving and celebratory.

I commit myself to stop my personal self interest and to stop myself from going into a traumatized state of mind when I see that my relationship with someone is changing and instead I commit myself to investigate and practice introspecting with regards to what it is that I have learned from the relationship and how has the relationship enriched my mind, myself and my life and living.
EqualifeI commit myself to slowing down, to breathe, and to in self honesty really look at the relationships within my life and actually learn from them and through learning from them change my living and my behavior.

I commit myself to opening up a connection with my daughter/children to see, realize and understand that it’s opening up within me a particular part of me or a particular expression, or a particular characteristic that I had not yet recognized inside myself that I have accessed through the relationship and I commit myself to allow myself to see the unique expression that each relationship I have with another is a gift for me to recognize about myself.

I commit myself to investigate what is my daughter/my child showing of me that I haven’t recognized or lived within myself and what is it of me that I am accessing in relationship with them and in that to see the gift they are giving.

Therefore, I commit myself to stop the mind relationship where I attach another into my mind and make them a part of an energetic episode of spite and anger, to thus stop my fear of things changing and/or stopping the projection of things changing, and to instead live in the moment, to see what I can learn from others from myself everyday and to make the most out of every moment of breath so that together we can focus on changing our world to one where All abuse and suffering such as poverty can be stopped, because in seeing ourselves in another we will learn/accept the gift of giving as we’d like to receive.

I commit myself to be more directive in my life with regards to the relationships within my life, to become more intimate and grateful for the gifts that the connections these relationships have afforded me throughout my life.

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“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that Parents are not Instructed how to Instruct Children and are thus Not Qualified to be Instructors and are thus Destructors that will even Defend their Right to Destroy their Children in spite of the Fact that if one’s not Trained in Effective Direct Instruction, one is in fact Not Qualified to have Children under one’s Supervision and would Never Employ someone Unqualified to do a Job – yet the most Important Job on Earth, which is to Instruct Newborn Children, is allowed to be Instructed by Unqualified, Inadequate Trainers – resulting in a World where No One is in fact Ever Qualified or Instructed to be part of a Society that is Best for All Present on Earth; and Although lip service is paid to Ideals like ‘Love thy Neighbor as Thyself’ it is Never Actualized as the Parent as New Life Unqualified Instruction Never Learned the Practical Implication where ‘Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself’ actually Exists.

I commit myself to SHOW that All Education and Intellect on Earth is Based on the Foundation of Ignorance to Disregard the fact that the Initial Instructions of a New Born Child were Inadequate and thus at Root Cause for a World and Society that live in Ways that Do Not Honor Life or Each other, but only Honor Survival as Successful Living.

I commit myself to SHOW that No One can Walk the Path of Self Correction as What is Best for All Life without Instructions, as the Way to Life is Not In the Inner Structure of the Human, and thus the Desteni-I-Process is of Essential Importance if One is Ready to Face the Nature of a World of Ignorance.” Bernard Poolman

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Support Living Income Guaranteed

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How to Successfully Commit to the Relationship

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Day 259: Forgiving Holding-on

For Context Please Read: Day 258: Facing Emotional Suppression

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to hold on to and not want to let things go within the nature of abuse existent in and as those I have formed relationships with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to hold on to something and/or someone within my mind within an illusion where I believe the nature of the relationship will forever remain as the illusion I’ve created.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold on to the specific connection with my daughter in order to solidify who I am within and as superiority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I let go of who I become in superiority in the presence of my daughter in/as anger and spite that a part of me will die even though I existed even before the connection between us was there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and create the illusion that who I am as anger and spite will never change.

Artwork by Marlen Vargas Del Razo

letting go

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the relationship I have with my daughter for fear that if I let go and change the nature of our relationship that then I won’t have a relationship with her at all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that how my relationship is with my daughter is how the relationship will always be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to and cycle within the same abusive patterns toward my daughter over and over again.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare the relationship I have with my daughter to how I see that other mother/daughter relationships exist as.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to set myself up mentally, emotionally and physically to be traumatized when something changes within my world and my reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself in how I reacted and/or responded to things changing within my relationship to my daughter and/or to other people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try and control my daughter and/or another being, another beings mind or their life because in fact I have no idea what they have planned for themselves and their life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the connection I have with my daughter where a long time ago I projected my ideas and beliefs and plans for her life onto her, when really, they were the plans of my mind and have thus been held in self-interest and motivated in feelings and emotions.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand the drama that I’ve bestowed upon my children while I sought to control them through superiority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget to be grateful and celebratory of my children because of my lack of understanding of the connection between myself and my children within my mind which lead me to go into a point of a personal self interest when the relationship changes instead of investigating how having the relationship has enriched my life and living.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that letting go is stopping the fear of loss and lonelyness and inner struggle.

more to come…

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“Who we are Today as Humanity started at Home, it started in each one’s Personal Life, it started in Your Thoughts and How you made Those Thoughts Physical and How you have Taken that Into your Personal and Interpersonal-Relationships and How you Took that into the Universal Relationship of What is Acceptable in this World.

So: Do Thoughts Create Reality? No, but In a situation where Thought is Not Understood, Can One Create Reality with Thought? Certainly. The Problem is that If one takes the Personal into the Universal you will create the Same Issues You have Within-You in the Bigger System, but it is Not Reality, it is the Illusion because Thought is an Illusion. So: Can Thought Create an Illusion? Yes, certainly, that’s what it Really Does, it Doesn’t Create Reality.

Reality is that there are a Lot of Beings on Earth All Essentially from the Origin of Life with Equal Life within Each One, If one Applies that at the Personal, Interpersonal and Universal Level, you will have a World of Harmony and Peace because one will Care about Another and as much as You would Care about Yourself, You Will Give to Another as You Would Like to Receive Yourself. You would be Balanced Human and You Will Not have an Illusion that Controls Who You Are at a Personal Level, who you are in the Interpersonal Level and Who you Become within the Universal Level.” Bernard Poolman

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Day 258: Facing Emotional Suppression

My daughter said to me today, she said mom, you’re just ‘Mean’. Her and her partner and my 3 year old granddaughter have been living with us for almost a year and having them here has been quite the challenge for us all but still, to hear her say those words to me wasn’t easy. It really wasn’t surprising to hear because it’s a point that I avoid facing in myself. It’s actually a point of spitefulness and anger and I’m aware that I often exist as such toward her and for that matter toward the world in general. Still, it’s a point I try and cover up, and it’s one I’ve avoided because to realize it about myself is uncomfortable to say the least.

It’s like if I look at it then I’ll have to let it go and I’m afraid of letting go so instead I run away and hide in emotional suppression and in the past I’ve used various addictions/behaviors and/or I’ve become so good at distracting myself that I’ve never given myself the opportunity to see this point through to release it. It’s strange to realize that something so self deMeaning is actually something I fear letting go of.

no more

So it’s time that I ask myself what am I running away from? And why am I accepting the illusion of fear that whoever I’ve become I cannot change?The fact is, a long time ago when I was very young, it was like everything got heavy inside and out, and I began to turn to my thoughts and the imagination of my mind for comfort and to make decisions for me, to decide who I was to become. In doing so I suppressed myself into and as my mind and I became very angry at myself and spiteful for doing so. I quickly learned to direct that anger and spite onto the people in my life and I even created addictions to drugs such as weed and ultimately manifested the polarity of running away and not doing anything but kept myself in the illusion of “just being” when in actuality, I only sunk deeper and deeper into and as my mind in anger and spite.

Artwork by Marlen Vargas Del Razo

It’s an interesting point to come face to face with because the closer I look I realize that it is this very point that has kept me from facing my fear of dying that my having cancer has brought with it. I realize now that I can let go of the anger and spite and face my fear of death only as I first forgive myself and release that which I’ve already lived as. Because how can we ever fully overcome our fear of death if we’ve not yet understood the ‘Meaning’ and the Purpose of Life and the only way to do that is to first in self-honesty, go within to the beginning and face who and what we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become… This will require patience and no more waiting.

More to come.

“Patience is a stand within and as oneself where one knows when one has to step back, wait and when one has to act. Patience is to know when to let something / someone go for a moment / a while and when to hold on. Patience is a stand within and as oneself, where – despite not knowing what the outcomes may be: one continue walking / standing here…” ~Sunette Spies, Practical Desteni

Day 257: Calling the Beast by it’s Name – Breast Cancer – Breast Cancer Awareness Month – Day 34

October kicks off with something called ‘The National Breast Cancer Awareness Month’ (NBCAM), which is basically where numerous public service organizations, the medical establishment and government agencies come together to promote breast cancer awareness. Now this whole thing began more than 25 years ago when the National Cancer Institute (NCI) began to raise money to fund their seemingly never ending research into Cancer.

“The Establishment politicians passed legislation to declare WAR upon CANCER. Thus, they went to Fort Detrick and took down the U.S. Army Chemical and Biological Warfare department SIGN. They then placed two signs on the front gate of the facility: on the left, NATIONAL CANCER INSTITUTE (NCI), and on the right, WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION (WHO). This was and is properly ballyhooed by the Establishment Media, and financed to the tune of several hundred Billion Dollars yearly from American taxpayers.” Dr. William Donald Kelley, D.D.S., M.S.

breast cancer aawarenessThe deception runs deep so, I suggest this October, as we begin Breast Cancer Awareness Month, we educate ourselves about what it is we’re actually supporting. I mean, has it come to our awareness as to how much money the elite officials of these organizations earn yearly?

How much of the money raised goes to assist those who actually have cancer? Very little…And, Is the research these funded corporations claim they are doing, has it made any real difference in the Prevention of Cancer? The fact is, the cost of prevention has not even brought about a decrease in Cancer.

In fact, the odds of who will get cancer now, compared to 25 years ago, has actually increased to almost 1 in every 2 people. At the moment, my family is an example of the reality of those facts because in April of this year, (2013), I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Then just 2 weeks ago my cousin who’s in her early 40’s, was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. And then just two weeks later, my aunt who’s in her early 70’s, (the mother of my cousin who has thyroid cancer), she was just diagnosed with cancer in both her breasts.  That’s 3 family members who all in the same year have now been diagnosed with Cancer.

So Cancer,  is on the increase. Yet strangely enough we continue to fund the research and accept the current established treatment for Cancer the same way we’ve always done. Not realizing that we’re living the consequences of those decisions and seeing an increase in Cancer.

I mean, to hell with pink.   The statistics should be a red flag for us to question whether or not we’ve reached any Real point of Awareness about how and why our Physical body gets Cancer. So, what is going on within Our Society and Why is Cancer on the increase?

We will find the answer to our question as we take a closer look at the organizations whose research we’re currently funding. In this we can know who is making money off of people getting cancer?

The fact is, no one is providing a solution to Cancer that can be equally available and given to everyone according to what’s best for all.

We’re not yet aware of how much of what we eat and breathe and consume – how All of That – contributes to how our body processes and provides for itself. It’s time we asked how is our consumer-money-drivin lives creating the very disease everyone is scared as hell to be diagnosed with.

Alright so the fact is, we’ve got to Educate ourselves about how and why these organizations are being supported when the facts prove that they are part of the problem, instead of the solution.

“In short, the cancer victims of today face the Establishment enemy within, who are relentless and determined to Plunder and Kill you at any cost. ‘False Hope’ is not my objective. To be realistic, we have two enemies, CANCER and the ESTABLISHMENT. 

There will never be a CURE for Cancer until the Establishment can accomplish their objectives by permitting it. Their primary goals are money and control. What big conglomerate will get the blessings of the Big Establishment? Nothing happens on the world scene that is not planned and designed by The Big Establishment.” Dr. William Donald Kelley, D.D.S., M.S.

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Suggest The Following:

Charity and Activism – why is it a Capitalistic Scheme – Overview – Day 293 

Day 100 – The REAL Veracity of Philanthropy

Day 257: Charity – Celebration of Human Selfishness

Day 81 Crime’s Journey to Life – Charity as Entertainment

Day 158: Prevention is the Best Cure

157. Wishing Well as Self Interest

287. You get Happy with your Paycheck?

Day 79: Charity will not end Poverty

Day 20: The Insanity of Economics – Food Aid Does Not Help the Poor

2012 – Stop Suppression to Stop Possession: Dare to Share 

Human Chains

Day 350: A Living Income Guaranteed will End Charity – for Real

Day 148: Swopping Places

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Day 39: Is Charity Greed?

“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that charity has been abused by the corporations to promote their products and distribute them to the poor – while the corporation, at the same time, benefit from tax benefits which place more pressure on the community at large with tax requirements to meet the budgets of a failed system.

I commit myself to show that charity is a criminal act that condemns the poor to a Life of failure and early death because the charitable will not give up their control and will justify the abuse through supporting a failed system in spite of the clear certainty that the system has failed.

I commit myself to question the integrity of activists, and to remind activists that activism should be about a new world system that is best for all life always, and that any activist that cannot stand for what is best, is in fact only an extension of the system of greed that has failed Life in every way.” Bernard Poolman