Tag Archive | Chemo

Day 300: The War Within Lies

Sometimes, I can’t believe this is how my story goes. Meaning the way my life is at the moment with where I am as I continue to get well from cancer. Within that realization my mind is like on mourning mode and sometimes I get lost in it… Then, last night I dreamed I was at war and I realized how my war within lies.

war within
There is and has been for awhile in my life, a war going on within and as me. This war I started against myself when I was in my early teens. Pain seems to intensify my fears and so the war within me seemed to grow. So it’s strange but things got worse for me when the first of July of this year I added another intense alternative treatment therapy.

The particular treatment I will speak more about when I’m able to – caused my physical body to take quite a hit, and unfortunately, in fear, I lost sight of the struggle my body was going through because all I could think to do in that fear was to keep pushing myself to do whatever I had to do,,, for however long I had to do it, so long as I get myself well from the cancer.

The treatment brought with it consequence of physical / muscle deterioration and extreme physical pain, and, in my lack of awareness, I began taking more and more prescribed pain meds and muscle relaxants , as well as alternative methods in my quest to relieve the pain.

Everything I was doing, it became to much for my physical body. Both my kidneys and my liver began to show symptoms of trouble – trouble from all the methods I’d chosen to help relieve my pain. I had no choice. I had to get off of everything and so a month ago, I did. I stopped taking all the prescription pain meds and muscle relaxants and ibuprofen. I also stopped all alternative methods I’d been using for pain as well.

Now I use nutrition/foods/juice / Omega 3’s and herbal remedies only to reduce the inflammation. I also drink teas with hibiscus, passion flower, lemon balm, just to name a few of the many wonderful herbs and seasoning I use, like tumeric and even capsicum/cayenne pepper.

I also stopped the intense alternative treatment method that I started 5 months ago. And with the assistance of some private interviews / tools that I was fortunate to receive through Eqafe, I’ve been able to easily stop the pain meds with very few side affects and have become effective in breathing through the fear when the pain comes and have been also been successful in my practice of directing myself to change who I am within the fear so as to forever release who I accepted and allowed myself to be within the fear to where I am able to redefine in awareness who I am within and as my physical body when the pain come.

It’s interesting, because I’ve been experiencing less pain as I’ve become more aware of who I’ve been within my accepted belief of myself as my mind to one where I’m understanding that those beliefs about myself no longer ring true to who I am directing myself to be and become as my physical body/ mind and being. Within this forgiving myself comes and that is for sure something one can become successful in doing, forgiving oneself.

My Eqafe personal interviews have also assisted me in becoming aware of how in my pain/fear over the course of 5 months, I created some automated pain patterns. Yeah.. But then after coming off all those pain meds, I’ve also been able to develop an awareness of how often my mind will tell me the movement that I’m about to do – like getting up to go to the bathroom for example – is going to hurt like hell, when in fact, when/as I stop the thoughts/fears, and focus on my breathing while I make the move, it actually doesn’t hurt at all. Sounds crazy I know,  and it is crazy,  how easy we can create patterns.  Therefore, it’s best we learn how to create the patterns that will assist us to live our utmost potential and thus begin to be able to assist in creating a world where All Life can live their utmost potential.

Within the automated patterns, I’ve also created pictures of myself within my mind.  and these patterns I continue to investigate and are part of the war within my dream last night. I will be sharing more on this in blogs to come.

At the moment, I am here, focusing on substantiating my physical body. Beginning with committing myself to make sure that every single day I give my body what it requires nutritionally to repair and recover and heal.

I commit myself to walk in breath and awareness as I consistently nourish my physical body to the best of my ability, and to redefine and become a living expression of the word relax within and as my physical body as I continue to walk my story, my Journey to Life.

Day 294: You Can have your Apple and Eat the Seeds too! – Day 2: How Rational is your Fear?

appleseeds2

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For Further Context: Day 292: Calling the Beast by it’s Name – Breast Cancer – How to Stop Emotional Fear Energy – Day 44

Day 293: Wait, you can’t enjoy that, you have Cancer! – Day 1: What’s Stopping You?

My Links For Self-Support:

EQAFE

Desteni I Process

Self & Living

One Answer to Cancer

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Great video below about Vitamin B17 case histories:

 Vitamin B17,laetrile case histories;lung, colon, breast, prostate

Link provided below to the reference I made in this podcast about how finally Big food brands are getting nervous, because their sales of processed, packaged foods have dropped considerably: 

Consumers’ new eating habits are hurting Big Food’s profits

Day 293: Wait, you can’t enjoy that, you have Cancer! – Day 1: What’s Stopping You?

what's stopping you

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For Further Context: Day 292: Calling the Beast by it’s Name – Breast Cancer – How to Stop Emotional Fear Energy – Day 44

My Links For Self-Support:

EQAFE

Desteni I Process

Self & Living

One Answer to Cancer

Day 286: Calling the Beast by it’s Name – Breast Cancer – The Nature of Worry – Day 40

From the moment I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer I became more familiar than I ever have with regards to the Nature of Worry. As I began the alternative cancer treatments I outlined for myself,  and as I continue with them, I still struggle, because honestly, most days I feel physically ill and physically out of sorts within myself.

worry

Fortunately the physical reactions are lessoning and within that I’m realizing just how strong and capable who I am as my Physical body really is. Our Physical Body is constantly ingesting and processing all the physical and mental input that WE are constantly providing for it.  We just haven’t quite grasped what goes on within our physical body for it to be able to reach a point of proper chemistry and balance.

Nothing and no one works so exquisitely as our Physical body does to provide for us the vessel, the ability to experience and express ourself as life.

Yet, here’s the thing, as I’ve been walking this process of assisting my physical body to heal and correct the damage I’ve imposed upon it from years of living through and as my mind as wants and desires – what’s happened is that I’ve fallen prey to worry through my own acceptance and, my fear of losing my perception of control – the result is that I haven’t applied myself as effective as I know I am capable of – with regards to Stopping my participation in and as my mind as thoughts, feelings and emotions.

Mostly this is because I accepted and allowed old patterns of behavior to creep in as I allowed who I am as my mind to not only screw with me, but to direct me, instead of me directing myself as my mind! So, after investigating this point for awhile now while applying self-forgiveness and, through using the tools I’ve learned through Desteni I Process Pro,  I’ve come to see, realize and understand that the underlying point within my acceptance of my behavioral patterns is rooted within and as the nature of worry – specifically with regards to worrying about myself when I have a physical reaction to my therapy – which may last for days and is like an emotional roller coaster where I experience myself as losing control.

The same applies to how every six to nine months I have to send off lab work to keep track of how I’m physically doing, to see if the cancer has spread or is reducing…  What happens is, I allow myself to come and go within a possession of worry, where from the moment I send off my urine / lab test until the moment I receive the results – I secretly worry and wait and hope the results will make me feel like my life is once again in my hands / control.

This then the beginning of the End of me accepting and allowing this construct / pattern to continue within and as me.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to consider how it is the emotional nature of worry is produced in the mind-physical relationship.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand how worry is connected to patterns within my mind where I tend to wonder off into my imagination / where I wonder off into and as my mind thinking and looking at different scenerio’s of what if this happens or what if that happens – teetering between positive and negative energjes / mind possessions, specifically with regards to when I have physical reactions and /or when I’m ‘waiting’ on test results to determine if there is any improvement in my condition.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let the fear energy within worry have an effect on me where I stop my awareness of what my physical body is saying to me and instead allow myself to be directed by/as my mind within the nature of worry – where it’s like my heart races and my upper body becomes tight and a tenseness slowly moves within and through my entire physical body.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand another dimension of worry which is that of ‘waiting’.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand another dimension of worry which is the fear of losing control, where my mind has backchat / thoughts of: I can’t do anything / oh my God I’m not in control / what if’s and maybe’s.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear a loss of control from the moment I send off my urine / lab test until the moment I receive the results, where I will teeter back and forth in a possession of worry until I get results that make me feel like my life is once again in my hands / control.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I’m applying my daily alternative treatment routine, how when and if I begin to experience pain, or a flu like symptom occurs, such as nausea, diarrhea, fever, heavy feeling within my physical body (toxicity), fatigue, etc, where I see myself go almost automatically into an acceptance of worry within myself – in believing that the reaction must mean that the cancer is spreading, and within that for all the waiting moments to ‘feel better’ and for the fear of losing control – instead I see, realize and understand that the metabolic program / treatment I’m walking brings about a readjustment in body chemistry as it heals, and how as my physical body meets the changing situations it responds in surprising ways to the process and to apply common sense instead of worry.

Therefore, I commit myself to when and as I see myself as my physical body having a physical reaction, I Stop, I Breathe, I see, realize and understand how the longer the deficiencies within my physical body have existed the more prevalent the reaction is likely to be as a physiological balance of chemistry and healing takes place within and as my Physical Body.

I commit myself to stop who I am as the nature of worry through a practical physical application of walking real-time self change according my decision to direct myself to stop myself from reacting when I realize my physical body is having a physical reaction to treatment,  as well as walking the same in stopping my participation in and as worry when the moment comes for me to send in for lab testing, etc.

more on this point to come in future posts

 

2012 – Big Money vs Cancer cure will End – With Equal Money


What is the purpose of having a ‘government entity’, in this case, the Food and Drug Administration, (FDA), when the ‘government entity’, is in fact ‘financed’ by the very people that it’s suppose to be holding accountable?

The responsibility of the FDA is to ensure the safety and well being of the people and to make decisions to ensure that foods are safe for consumption and are correctly labeled. They also oversee medicines (Pharmaceutical companies), medical devices (from bandages to artificial hearts), blood products, vaccines, cosmetics, veterinary drugs, tobacco products, animal feed, and electronic products that emit radiation (such as microwave ovens and video monitors), to ensure that these products are safe, effective, and practical.

Our current system has produced deadly consequences for all life according to decisions made based upon ‘profit and loss’ of the corporations – instead of what’s best for all.

Corporations seek profit and personal gain through ego, power and greed and that’s a fact we’re all familiar with. We’ve all personally made decisions based upon what is best only for ourselves. The consequences of maintaining a world in this manner has manifested poverty, homelessness, starvation, war, corruption and destruction is increasing at an alarming rate.

Let’s say, for example, there is a cure for cancer” – who would know? Very few… Become familiar with, ‘Burzynski, the Movie’, which is the story of a medical doctor and Ph.D biochemist named Dr. Stanislaw Burzynski. In the 1970’s, Dr. Burzynski made a remarkable discovery that threatened to change the face of cancer treatment forever.

Dr. Burzynski’s, “Antineoplastons” Therapy – a non-toxic gene-targeted cancer medicine, could have helped save millions of lives over the last two decades had his discovery not been criminally suppressed.

The FDA and Pharma (Pharmaceutical Research and Manufacturers of America) quickly realized that if Dr. Burzynski’s discovery were to be given a fair review process – chemotherapy and radiation therapy would dwindle into obscurity and financially cripple the industry giants. Which meant that all of the ‘money’ would funnel away from big Pharma and into the lap of one single scientist, who of course, holds exclusive patent rights. Big Pharma is the world’s most profitable business, which is currently estimated to be worth $275 Billion.

These are documented facts of our history that we accepted and allowed. Yet, who is aware that in March, 1976 – the FDA Bureau of Drugs, Director Richard Crout states in, ‘The Cancer Letter’, “that when anyone other than large institutions ask permission to conduct clinical trials, you want harsh regulations… sometimes we say it is proper to hinder research. Crout was quoted by ‘The Spotlight, on Jan, 18, 1982 of stating, “I never have and never will approve a new drug to an individual, but only to a large pharmaceutical firm with unlimited finance.”


What has been called ‘the fiercest fight in FDA history’, was their fight against Dr. Burzynski.

In 1983, the FDA commenced with a civil action to close Burzynski’s clinic and stop all patients from receiving treatment. Before the judge in the case had announced her ruling, the FDA sent her a letter warning her in advance; “If this court declines to grant the injunction sought by the government, thus permitting continuing manufacture and distribution of “Antineoplastons” Therapy by defendant,…the government would then be obliged to pursue other less efficient remedies, such as actions for seizure (his clinic and home were raided), and condemnation of the drugs (propaganda campaign), or criminal prosecution of individuals ( If convicted, Dr. Burzynski would have faced a maximum of 290 years in a federal prison and $18.5 million in fines). Regardless, the judge basically said he can treat anybody in Texas, but he can’t ship his medicine in interstate commerce.

The FDA viewed that as a failure and informed Dr. Burzynski’s attorneys that they had other ways to ‘get him’. There’s much more to the story and it is no wonder most have never heard of Dr. Burzynski’s cure. Money/God/Power (all of which are the same), won over the safety and well being of the people and ‘Life’ itself.

Where is ‘the responsibility to ensure the safety and well being of the people’ and who of us ‘people’ would object to a proven cure such as Dr. Burzynski’s and, who here would object to it becoming available to every single living being of earth?

Those who object are those that have money, those that we allow to profit from and remain in power over us and our world. It’s time to stop. This is after all, a world that we are all a part of.

If we continue to support and put money in the pockets of those who already have all of it – we’re giving them the power to abuse and de-value all Life.

The story of Burzynski’s cure is only one example of what an Equal Money System will bring an end to. And, the point here to understand is, Never again will ‘one’ entity and/or ‘one’ individual profit over what is best for all.

In an Equal Money System, whatever is required to ensure the safety and well being of the people will be given to, ‘All’ the people, as well as to all the animals, plants, our entire environment. That which is required to properly sustain, maintain and manifest life here to it’s ultimate physical potential, is an Equal Money System. Who knows what we’re actually capable of as mankind, in creating who we really are as life according to a Principle of Equality. A world where the Only ‘cure’ necessary begins within manifesting self here, Equal and One as All.

Investigate Equal Money – Investigate what’s really being accepted and allowed in this world – and what is not.

Join us as we stand together as one group through a one man one vote system ensuring a dignified Life for All.

For Further Questions click Here