Tag Archive | breath

Day 41: My Mind Said ———> Run!

I Stop. I Breathe —> I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to after reading today’s chat on Desteni’s private forum – I saw how I experienced back chat within a belief about self that I’ve created which said, ‘you still don’t know anything, so forget it, run away, hide’!

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create beliefs about myself through back chat as self talk where I have accepted a point of fear toward myself as true, such as fear within a belief that I’m not able to direct myself effectively in my process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create beliefs about myself through backchat within a false ego of myself of believing that I’ll never accept myself within a point of self-intimacy, so just give up and try and be happy.

Artwork By: Scott Cook

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself through a filter of behaviour in fear as backchat as self-created thoughts that I have not only accepted but have convinced myself of as being true where I have made them a living statement where my belief has become a reality of who I am in action as a religion of self.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that within self-created beliefs about myself I am so suppressed that I will never reach a point within myself where in self-honesty I will allow myself to know me as an expression of myself as life as living words according to what’s best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not realize that fear is actually a desire of my mind to protect itself from harm where a fearful experience and/or a belief of self as failing serves it’s purpose in that is seals my fate to remain enslaved as consciousness.

When and as I see myself existing in a pattern of fear as back chat/thoughts, I stop. I breathe and I realize that the secret mind fears for it’s survival and will seek and avoid being revealed as the deception that it is. Thus, I commit myself to slow down, breathe and remain here in realizing that there is no where to hide from myself and that it’s taken years of accumulating myself within constructs and patterns and it will require patience with self to walk the corrective application of self in releasing them, and that the only solution is the path of an Equal Money system so that everyone will have access to the de-programming offered through Desteni I Process. Thus, Equal Money is the Only solution that I Commit myself to for the remainder of my life here on earth.

I commit myself to Stop being a victim of fear.

I commit myself to standing in self-honesty in realizing that – the behaviour patterns of my secret mind as back chat/thoughts, where in fear I judge my process and limit who I am within self-created beliefs to/toward myself – that such behaviours and actions as self No longer serve me as who I am walking this Journey to Life through self-forgiveness, and, in self-honesty, I Stop fearful backchat, and I stand in support of life according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to forgiving and releasing the image of myself as ego/fear that I’ve placed before the true image of I am/life.

I commit myself to supporting a system of Equality to improve the experience of life for every living being within our world.

For Excellent support and perspective – Read: Creation’s Journey to Life
Day 42: Fear – Be AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID

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Day 36: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger

Part 2 of Day 35: Under the ‘In-flu-ence’

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” ~Friedrich Nietzche

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that hardship, pain and suffering will make us stronger which is actually suggested through stories from the bible – instead of realizing that to believe that life is about living in hardship, pain and suffering is to continue the enslavement of the mind – and an excellent reminder of why I made the decision to face myself through self-forgiveness and to in self-honesty – Stop the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within fear and self-interest based upon people in my life and/or things in my life that I have feared losing the most.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become possessed within my mind within the memories that I’ve had with regards to my brother/sister/mother, because I didn’t want to face the point of them actually being gone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto memories of my brother/sister/mother within my mind rather than face what it means that they no longer exist within this physical reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use memories as a defense and protection mechanism where the greatest fear that the memory protect of the person in my mind is who am I alone with myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an internal experience within myself with my mind where I go into mourning in relation to the person in my life who has died thus creating a relationship with them in mind memories, and then become emotional as mourning because of the fear of being alone with myself.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am only not able to change that which I believe I can’t change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing a safe comfortable feeling within the cushy idea of myself as part of a middle class American family, which wasn’t anything great, but yet provided the perfect backdrop for the continued enslavement of my mind as consciousness.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to waste even one more minute within a place of mourning – instead of realizing that the deliberate abuse of others – where one seek at all cost to have more than another must stop – thus at this point, the only solution for those that don’t and/or won’t stand up in support for a system to bring an end to All suffering, is the fact that we’re all equal in the fact that we die – thus death is the one thing that assists in sorting out the mess of inequality existing within our world.

Desteni Farm

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my own limitations within memories, emotions and feelings, and is the reason why within my children lies the future of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use feelings in self-interest as memories/personalities so to accept my self-interest as more important than what is best for all Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that which is here as what we as a humanity have accepted and allowed in our abusive nature through comparison, competition, ego and greed, where we have taken instead of given, robbed of life instead of standing up as life, and where we have taken for granted the quantity of life provided here on earth in our wanting/seeking to have more than our neighbor.

I commit myself to making peace with the fact that the beings that once were my mom/sister and brother no longer exist within this physical reality.

I commit myself to stopping my accepted point of limitation in and as mourning and making peace within myself with death.

I commit myself to daily self-forgiveness in stopping who I’ve been in self-interest and thus assisting in stopping our self-interest driven current world/money system.

I commit myself to supporting a System of Equal Education for All where Life is an understanding within living where self realizes that – Life is Not about living according to “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” – Life is about supporting thy neighbor as thyself in committing thyself to standing equal and one to all in absolute unconditionally as Life.

I commit myself to realizing that self-forgiveness is only real when I change me as I forgive.

“I commit myself to walk the 7 Year Process day by day as a guide and example for those that would dare to return to Life.

I commit myself to challenge all knowledge and information that is not best for all Life and to establish and participate in research to investigate ALL things AGAIN and to ONLY KEEP what is best for ALL LIFE always.

I commit myself to remind man that Earth is where it will be established – who each one really IS – Life as the Group Life, or Ego as Loner that ABUSE.” ~ Bernard Poolman ~ Creation’s Journey to Life – Day 38: Rebirthing as Life

Day 26: Simple in-a-sense

Today, my 22 month old granddaughter walked up close to me more than once and reached for, and held my hand – once while I was fixing her lunch, once while we looked out the window and once while we stood talking to the dogs. In-a-sense, the touch of our hands left nothing between us unsaid.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget how to enjoy holding hands with another for the simple reason of breathing in the moment together.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lose my sense of connection within and as the physical-ness of simply touching and breathing one with and as another being.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to miss the perception of myself as a child before I became aware of the sense of fear slowly creeping in and as me through fear of loss.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to mourn for the child I use to be because in the beginning as a child I saw life as something worth living instead of the day to day struggles adults live in trying to survive our current money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget what it is to be equal with the dirt between my fingers and toes.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to stop enjoying a walk in the rain feeling the touch of the raindrops falling down upon my face.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to choose the company of another according to what they can do for and give to me, instead of enjoying the presence of breath together.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to win over the rights to have something as only mine with regards to that which I was once willing to give/share.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to escape my moment of breath through complicating it in comparing who has the biggest piece of the pie.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to keep secrets within myself hiding parts of me in and as my mind in shame.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed energetic experiences to interfere in my ability to see the abuse I’ve allowed and walked as in total disregard of all life here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to manipulate and control moments of my life, instead of living each breath here within this moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dream bigger than the day before instead of living grateful for this moment in breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take life for granted wherein I wanted the best and the most of what can be had, instead of breathing in the simplicity of the moments in awareness to simply not step on a rollie polie crossing the path in front of me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a living version of my parents in all their prejudices, judgments and fears.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be influenced according to and as the fears I participated in within my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to whine and feel sorry for myself until I became that which I felt sorry for myself for and that which I whined on about.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take life for granted as I participated in my mind of self-interest and greed wherein all I thought about was getting from life whatever it took for me to be happy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to run and play and seek to have the most of what is here, all the while never considering the lives of those who suffer in poverty, homelessness and war.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give myself authority to be and become me as my mind as consciousness wherein I’ve disregarded the earth, the dirt, the plants and water and the air, everything that allows life to exist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to refuse to ascertain the dishonesty of believing in myself as who I am as my mind of thoughts, feelings and emotions and in how me participating in and as them is to value only the interest of self and thus to disregard me as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to through the value I placed in and as my mind became self-interest driven and failed to see/realize and understand that in the interest of self as the mind the world as a whole is suffering and dying daily.

I commit myself to the simplicity in seeing that life is meant to be an equal living expression for all living beings here on earth living a quality of life in dignity.

i commit myself to keeping it simple moving myself as my physical body as a foundation of support that all life may experience themselves in dignity.

I commit myself to standing up for all life to bring about an Equal Money System and thus bring an end to poverty and starvation and creating Heaven on Earth.

Whining about how ‘somebody done somebody wrong song’ ends – With Equal Money


‘The Design of the Whiner’ is effective assistance to hear for one to spot one’s fears. Before applying the Desteni Material, ‘whiner’ was how I existed, as I constantly emerged myself in conspiracy and drama. I could spot a whiner a mile away according to how they nagged on about current events through ‘Verbal Diarrhea’ , you know, how we look for excuses and reasons for not doing something. Even when the tools, the support, the assistance and the methods are there in order for us to do that something/action for self. It’s where one doesn’t want to take the action in doing because of ‘fear’.

So I had pretty much given up on this world and everyone in it but, in self-honesty I began to see how I had given up on myself. I bitched about how our world exists with anyone who pretended to listen and never questioned what the real solution for our world is in considering what is best for all.

Applying the tools of Desteni assists one to begin to become aware of and question the fears of self and one begins to see how fear has been the motivating mind patterns of the life of self. It becomes easier to correct one’s talk and begin accumulating the walk of self as life living according to ‘principle’ and to question what principles we are living according to.

According to Wiki: A principle is a law or rule that has to be, or usually is to be followed, or can be desirably followed, or is an inevitable consequence of something, such as the laws observed in nature or the way that a system is constructed. The principles of such a system are understood by its users as the essential characteristics of the system, or reflecting system’s designed purpose, and the effective operation or use of which would be impossible if any one of the principles was to be ignored.

Come on, nothing here is how it has to be. How are world exists according to profit and greed where corporations and money are God, is so because we are dumbed down and we accept and allow it.

There are shit loads of stuff that we refer to as principles, for example: The Principle of Learning, Principle of Causality, Principle of Identity, Principle of Contradiction, Principle of Teaching, Principle of Management, Principle of Organization and of course the Principle of Fear and Money

All of which have distinctive ruling opinions which are enforced through and as the Principle of Money. Money being the ‘scarce’ resource that influence the human ‘fear of survival’. We are controlled and consumed by our experiences which ultimately support the rich to get richer and the rest can remain in hell.

It’s a process of self-honesty we as Destonians are walking and one that requires us to stop, breath, forgive ourself and realize that what is best for self is best for all. The one and only Principle that makes perfect sense and will bring an end to individual ‘fear of survival is the Principle of Equality.

Whining about how,’somebody done somebody wrong song’ ends – With Equal Money… Can you imagine? You, Me, Us, All, Everyone – we will all be able to provide for ourselves a home, food, clean water, transportation, an Education, clean clothes and Healthcare. Hell on Earth will then be over.

Investigate and Support EqualMoney.org

The definition of a moment is…

“What happened to the moment? Does anyone in this world understand the application of the moment, what a moment is – a moment is not able to be defined by anything here in this reality – a moment as who I am. I am the moment. The definition of a moment, is indicated by every breath” – – Osho through the interdimensio­nal portal

Read complete article Here—> Osho – I am the living word in every moment

Redefining Self as Responsibility

Allocation point of self within word ‘responsibility’
The word responsibility has represented emotions of something being demanded of me. A point of abdication and/or lack of trust in self – where I’ve compromised myself by acting as impulsive energies as a way of being ‘socially’ able to provide money for myself within this world. Where every perceived ‘right’ I thought I had I saw was subject to obligation. Where I then felt forced to succomb to becoming what was expected of me in order to ‘get the job done’, to ‘earn a living’ according to our current money systsem.

System definition of the word ‘responsibility’
Dictionary (Visuwords):
“a form of trustworthiness; the trait of being answerable to someone for something”

*an appropriate definition in seeing my allocation point in how I have defined myself according to responsibility

Sounding of the word:
re – ‘sponsibility’ -> re – ‘spontaneity’

Definition of spontaneity is impulsive movement and/or actions

The sound of the word re-sponsibility represents for me how I have existed as and lived responsibility defined according to an accepted impulsive energetic movement of self linked to an allowed definition of self as spontaneity and/or moments of energy seeking approval of self.

I existed within expectations of receiving a ‘reward’ if I am ‘acting’ responsible and where I constructed a system definition – self defined, depended upon and subject to energetic reactions/impulses and/or approval from others through impulsive actions of self as a way of comparing myself to others and/or attempting to be ‘seen’ as being ‘responsible’.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize myself as ‘spontaneity’ through practically living within a self-honest expression of myself.

Polarity point of responsibility as self – I Forgive – I Delete

The polarity point within my definition of self as ‘responsibility’, has been according to ‘responsibility’ as being a ‘good thing’. A positive cannot exist without a negative which makes perfect sense. Because, I was never able to sustain myself as ‘responsibility’ because there was no living example of myself as having lived self-trust as me as living and directing myself as being self-accountable and self-responsible for how and what I accept and allow to exist within our world. I survived subject to feelings and emotional whims of myself and others and I accepted and allowed myself to be dependent upon another for emotional and financial support. I adjusted my behavior where I put the responsibility of myself and how I wanted to experience myself in this world onto others. Thus abdicating myself from taking responsibility for how our world exists.

Expectations of ‘feeling good’ was a pre-requisite of being ‘responsible’, which is also an application of knowledge and information and a method of further suppressing myself into ‘feeling’ bad about myself through inferiority/superiority equations of comparison and fear of facing me within how and what I have accepted and allowed through my participation in and as thoughts. feelings and emotionally charged energy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within polarity points of good/bad, inferiority/superiority equations of comparison and emotionally charged energy experiences. I stop. I breathe – I delete the pattern of me as I now am aware of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to depend on and believe that others can give me a purpose and/or reason for how I was accepting and allowing myself to exist here according to a definition of myself through knowledge and information of how a responsible human being is ‘suppose’ to act, if one is being ‘responsible’. I stop. I breathe – I delete the pattern of me as I now am aware of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect to ‘feel good’ in order to believe myself as responsible for how I exist within and as and how I and others experience ourself here. I stop. I breathe – I delete the pattern of me as I now am aware of it.

Redefining self as responsibility

I am aware that I am No longer willing to accept feelings and/or emotions as a point of who I am willing myself to be as responsibility. In self-honesty, I see the practical indications of how I am equally responsible for my how my actions lived in self-interest and dishonesty have allowed our world to exist as it is. I stop. I breathe – I delete the pattern as I am now aware of it. I walk self-corrective application of me in self-honesty as self-responsibility to and as all as one as equal.

I redefine responsibility as self-responsibility as an expression of me as the moment as the breath within and as the certainty of self trust and self honesty as all as one as equal as who I am.

I empower myself in seeing that I am willing and able to stand up within self-responsibility and apply myself as responsible in every life circumstance according to the principle of breath within and as the principle of equality.

I stop what I have accepted and allowed within myself according to a defined experience of myself and others experiences of themselves within this world. I direct me as this world as all as one as equal.

I breathe, I accept myself as responsibility so that the manifested expression of who we are as self-honesty as all as one as equal may step forth as the experience of ourselves here.

I am here, I accept myself as responsibility to stop the mind, to live and apply myself through practical self-corrective application in realizing that each one is responsible for how our world exists through our participation in and as the mind of thoughts, feelings and emotions according to what we have accepted and allowed ourself to be. I do not accept nor allow myself or anyone else as anything less than who we are, as all as one as equal.

I stand as the re-definition of myself as self-responsibility for and as all as one as equal for all of eternity.

Dream of Self-forgiveness and Peeling layers of Self


Last night I had a dream where I was standing naked saying self-forgiveness and it was like I witnessed a release of self, similar to skin being peeled – like an onion. I saw me as my physical body looking in on myself from the inside out, free from difference and within that I had a sense of moistness within and as my physical body. I sensed a release of thirst – release of a thirst for power. Water being a vital point, in fact when I first woke up from my dream, it was as if I’d just finished a tall glass of water. Like I was completely hydrated and replenished. Interesting that when one is peeling an onion – how the first layers are dry but the further you peel the juicier and/or the more moist the onion is.

I was aware that through my application of self-forgiveness my physical body was releasing a physical manifested placement/imprint/design/definition of self as consciousness. As if I was shedding guilt and shame through and as the pores of self where I recognized myself standing exposed to myself in self-honesty. Simply put, I didn’t forget who I am while I rested. As I am one with self as self living self through self-forgiveness walking here in self-honesty as all as one as equal.

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