Tag Archive | breath

Day 279: When you say nothing at all

Wanting to blame my partner for how I experience myself is unacceptable, but I want to nonetheless. The thoughts in my head tell the story of how “he” doesn’t have anything to say to me that hasn’t been said a hundred times before. And the thought that comes forth from there is ‘that’s what happens when you’ve been with someone for 22 years’.  As I continue to investigate I realize there’s really something else going on…

When I participate in specific thoughts, an energy arises from within me that begins in the pit of my stomach and ever so slowly moves upward toward my head region. For a moment there is a slight energetic excitement and I realize how within my mind, I want to say something to my partner. I want to tell him how to be and how he should act toward me. I want him to validate me so I can stop ‘feeling bad’ about myself and I mean, how strange is it really to desire such attention and control over another person…

As I stop and breathe,  I realize I’ve been here before.  The experience of self pity is a negative emotion and as I investigate deeper I see how I feel physically and mentally tired – which makes sense considering how when I participate in certain thoughts like, ‘why doesn’t he say something’, how that stimulates and or triggers the emotion of self pity which in itself seeks to reach for some kind of self validation.

why do i feel so badThe thing is, self pity keeps me stuck in a pit within myself. It’s like a pit stop within where I hold myself within a sort of a gut wrenching fear. The fear to look on, to investigate who I am, to continue to READ the story, My Story. To see who I am within what I’m accepting and allowing within my fear to face All of me. As I continue to investigate I am able to see where and when I began to ‘feel bad‘…

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my partner for being the reason for me having a negative experience of myself when what’s going on within me actually has nothing at all to do with how my partner is or isn’t behaving.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that it’s not always the emotion of self pity that is the source point but actually the outflow consequence of the actual source point which is the ‘feeling bad’ emotion.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have a relationship with myself wherein I attack myself within my mind within self judgment statements.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to surrender myself to self judgment as the thought comes up about myself of, ‘I’m not living up to my full potential‘, and for accepting and allowing myself to become the ‘feeling bad’ emotion through participating in thoughts of self judgment which activates the’ self pity emotion’ and for what follows, which is ‘when’ I begin to seek validation, attention and / or recognition from someone and /or something outside myself such as in this instance, where I began to project frustration and anger to / towards my partner.

When and as I see myself having thoughts that are self judging, I stop. I Breathe. I commit myself to see this as a red flag for me to know it’s time to direct myself, to in self honesty investigate what it is that’s coming up within me that’s creating the ‘energy of feeling bad’ which is actually using my own mind against myself.

I commit myself to see, realize and understand that when I manipulate myself through self judgment and self pity, what I’m doing is reacting to my own mind, where I use whatever thoughts necessary to distract myself, even if it means blaming others, just so long as I don’t have to face who I am as the story and the characters/personalities that I have lived my entire life as.

I commit myself to stop abdicating myself as Life through self judgment, manipulation, blame and self pity.

I commit myself to remain aware of and so Stop abusing myself deliberately through self judgment, which activates feeling bad emotions and me feeling sorry for myself, which leads to the self pity energy.

I commit myself to see, realize and understand how to stop and change my relationship to self pity through stopping my participation in the ‘feeling bad’ reaction moment within myself.

I commit myself to utilize my memories as reference points to find when and where and why and towards who or what is it that the ‘feeling bad’ energy keeps activating from and ultimately producing the self pity energy.

I commit myself to let go of the energy of feeling bad and self pity.

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“I suggest, if you can Find it in you – you’re going to have to Look Very Deep to Find this: That you DO STOP, and Start your Process. It is Inevitable. You’re not going to get Away. There is No place to Hide. Every Single Energy, Every Single Thought, Every Single Thing you have EVER, in ANY WAY Conceived – leave a ‘Mark’, in your Book of Life. Make sure – it’s Worth Reading. Because, if it’s Not: There’s going to be a Consequence, and you can’t just ‘Wipe it Out’. You can Only take Responsibility for it through Self-Forgiveness, and from that perspective ‘Delete it’, in as much as, it will No Longer be the ‘You’ that will Create the Future – but, it will be the ‘You’ in the Past. And therefore you will Live in the ‘Present’, in every Moment – Living, Presenting, Being part of That which is Best for All, Always, which is what “Present” encompass, the HERE.” Bernard Poolman

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Day 101: The Character: ‘I said No’

Today I watched from a distance as a mother was telling her 11 month old child, ‘I said No’, over and over in a very stern tone. I saw within myself how I had a reaction to her which is not surprising because when I was raising my children, I acted as the same. A character as a mother who automatically repeats, ‘No’, and/or ‘I said No’. I am now comprehending how ignorant the whole point of telling our young children ‘No’, really is. That’s not to imply that children don’t require direction so that they don’t get in harms way, however, yelling ‘No’ at children and/or spanking them, I now see is Not the solution. Thus, sharing here the following self-forgiveness.

For further context and understanding, please read the following article and blogs.
Feral girl, 5, found living with a herd of cows can ‘only communicate by mooing’
Sacrificial Love of the Mother: DAY 48
Parenting Building a Child’s Character: DAY 85
Day 107: The Ignorance of Intent

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to as a mother become the character who ‘automatically’ says ‘No’ to my children without even considering and/or questioning my automated response in the act of saying no.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stop and look within myself when I hear myself tell my child No, because if I were to look within myself then I will see that to just automatically say No is to abdicate responsibility to/for/as my child – where I completely miss-take an opportunity to assist them to touch, investigate, question and enjoy who they/we are so as to determine for themselves who they will be within and as a part of this physical world/reality/existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how I am a living mirror of my mother as she was hers and as my child will be mine – in how for generation after generation we’ve existed where each child is/has been conditioned through/as their parents mind into and as one’s own mind – thus we are continuing to exist within and as the same memories/characters/personalities/thoughts and physical behaviors/habits and language as those before us to such a degree that we are/have become automated in our raising of our children and, thus have/are forfeiting the very nature of life itself because in doing so, we are voluntarily admitting defeat as a parent – instead of walking as a living example of what it is to be responsible, self-honest, stable and consistent as support for/as the child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give in to the power of saying No because as a child, in/as my secret mind, exist a memory of how it looked and felt to see the face of my parent when they experienced the power and control of saying no, and thus, I now have an automated program running within me as my secret mind to also experience what I perceive that I must now experience as power and control in/as saying No.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how I have come be automated to say No to my children within a positive energy experience where I accumulate and manifest myself from the starting point of/as friction/conflict as a negative energy experience and thus within and through the nature and action of me as blame, and within and as spite, I will excuse and justify my actions as I deliberately manipulate my child in order to gain, possess and empower my love onto my child within and as a controlling positive energy experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that when I say No to my child I am in fact fueling the child’s mind within a negative energetic charge as an experience of the mind in/as curiosity, thus the child will activate their secret mind where they will look for the opportunity to reach for that which they were told Not to, and within that will experience guilt to/toward themselves because they remember they were told Not to touch it, thus, to tell the child no instead of assisting the child in touching and investigating their world, only further enslaves the child to becoming a character within their mind where they then isolate themselves from their physical world/reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a world/money system where education is bought and paid for through memories/characters/personalities according to our past and history in/as money/survival, whereas we continue repeating cycles of abuse and neglect in which children of every generation continue to pay the pain forward – instead of standing up and stating what we know as true in that we require to Stop All systems within our world and begin again with a system which functions according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be so involved in/as my own mind of seeking, wanting and desiring experiences for myself that I didn’t allow each and every moment of breath with my child to count in assisting them to see for themselves what is acceptable and what is not within and as our physical world/reality/existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support a world/money system where parents struggle to put food on the table and within that fail to educate and prepare children to become responsible adults who are willing and able to stand up for and as All living beings as equals.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how the role of money and struggling to survive within this world plays a major role in the life of being a parent, because I see how I was always running to get somewhere but in the process I lost my breath and myself where I barely even remember my life with my children when they were small.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put money first above everything including my children, all the while lying to myself that money wasn’t important because I didn’t want to face my responsibility within how our current world/money system exists – I didn’t want to face how I have accepted and allowed myself and all life to live in hell enslaved to a money system where only the few who are rich are free from the constant fear of living paycheck to paycheck where we fear for the future of our children and our own survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within existing in/as memories/characters and personalities of/as acts of automation to/towards children, and my world – have abdicated myself as my physical body and this physical reality – meaning – I have given up my right of/as life because in such automated acts of/as self, I am proving that I don’t care enough to slow myself down and breathe myself here, to actually support myself as all as life – to investigate myself and our current world/money system and therefore support a system where No one suffers, No one starves to death, No one goes to war for the right of land over those who are already living on the land, and No one goes without a home and clean water, thus, I see, realize and understand the common sense in supporting an Equal Money System where I will know for sure that All living beings and our Earth, will be genuinely provided and cared for.

I commit myself to Stop myself as ignorant acts of saying No to children within automated acts of/as memories/characters and personalities, because I see, realize and understand how through breathing, writing and self-forgiveness one is able to correct, realign and redesign themselves, thus is able to assist and support a world/money/education system according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to investigate and forgive the memories/characters of/as my parents mind as consciousness as the memories/characters which are me as my mind and to assist and support myself to show how our world requires an education system where children are able to receive the support required in order to experience life of/as Heaven on Earth.

I commit myself to show how our world requires an education system that will prepare each one of us to become a self-aware, responsible part of the human race that lives a fulfilled and productive life of happiness and fun and, how Equal Money will ensure that everybody will be effectively educated to live in harmony with everything here including, plants, animals and our environment.

I commit myself to assist parents to see for themselves that the word No is actually not even necessary within a world where one is aware of themselves as breath.

I commit myself to show how the only real solution in assisting ourselves is one that will assist All living beings, thus a living solution is that of an Equal Money System which will guarantee life support for All life forms of Life on/as Earth.

I commit myself to support me as my physical body, to comprehend how life here on earth is a living representation of how, who and what exists within the mind physical body of/as the human.

I commit myself to show how who we are as our physical bodies within our physical reality, is all that we can actually trust, thus, in supporting an Equal Money system, we’re supporting life in trusting that which is real, our physical body and our physical reality.

I commit myself to show how we can change the very fabric of our being and thus change our world by simply placing ourself in the shoes of others.

**A MUST READ: Day 35: Equal Money will Save the World**

Day 100: For Giving Way

Art by Kelly Posey

This is blog 100 for me in my walking the Journey to Life, and I’m going to begin by sharing the following quote by Sunette Spies – which is a good start for me in sharing how this process of daily writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective/commitment statements have assisted me.

“This is important to see, cause I mean – this is what humanity is doing – apparently giving up on humanity/this world, but that’s not the real story – there’s OTHER THINGS they want to do with their lives than commit themselves to standing with/for all, fascinating that we got to the point where, we’d live in HELL in the HOPE for desires; instead of living the certainty of who self is and what self is walking for self as for all.” ~ Sunette Spies


That’s where I was before beginning the process of walking self-forgiveness. I had given up on myself and certainly on humanity and this world. And, Yes, there were ‘other things’ I ‘thought’ I wanted to do with my life and, I never actually considered committing myself to standing with/for all.

I had become a living example of someone living in their own created Hell in the Hope for and the Desires of having and getting, and getting, and getting, but, never ever satisfied. I had no clue what it really is to be self-responsible and self-accountable and I certainly didn’t have a clue what it meant, “To walk for self as for All.”

Walking this process, is something that I take very seriously and, I am gradually forgiving my way to walking responsibly and accountable and, beginning to comprehend what it really means to Stand as Self, Walking for Self, as for All. Within that, I see how in self-honesty, I am able to support and trust myself for the first time in my life and thus, I am becoming able to stand Equal As and for All.

We as a humanity, have a very long road, however, when we come together as one, and put self-interest and greed aside and support an Equal Money system – in that, we’ll be doing ouselves a huge favor because we’ll be for the first time ever, supporting who we are as our Physical Bodies and our Physical Reality – that which we’ve always abused and neglected, will thus be supported in every way.

Consider the fact that we’re all neighbors here on earth and we’re all we’ve got, so, we’ve got to support ourself through supporting others – to Stop what we’ve accepted and allowed as our current world/money system and come together as one Huge Group to peacefully support a system which operates according to what’s best for All.

In Common sense, we can see how self-responsibility and self-accountability is in the willingness to give to all as one wishes to receive, because in the giving is where the quality of living self as life exists.

It’s the Ultimate Solution. Join us, Writing, Forgiving, Walking and Supporting in/as the Journey to Life. You’ll see for yourself.

Day 96: I Commit Myself

Self-Commitment Statements for the following blogs:
Day 94: Establishing a Relationship – –
Day 95: Flesh – –


I commit myself to stop fearing pain within and as my physical body as I see, realize and understand that pain is here as me to assist me.

I commit myself to breathe through the resistance I’ve accepted and allowed to/towards the very existence of myself as my physical body.

I commit myself to breathe through the resistance I have to acknowledging the realness of myself as the flesh of me as my physical body.

I commit myself to embracing me as my physical body in/as self-intimacy.

I commit myself to stop the separation of me as my physical body as that which has been missing through how and what I’ve accepted and allowed of/as our world system of money through and as the mind of/as consciousness.

I commit myself to comprehending how pain in and as my physical body is here to support me in forgiving and releasing me from/as the memories/characters/personalities I’ve played from the inside out as who I’ve been, thus, to take self-responsibility for the creation of me from within myself to my outside self as our world/reality/existence.

I commit myself to investigating and communicating with me as my physical body where I am able to, in one moment of breath, see, realize and understand the exact assistance I require in order to support the physicality of who I am within and as my physical body and our physical reality.

I commit myself to stop myself as my mind from participating in and as emotions and feelings as internal reactions, to thus then stop manifesting and creating damage unto me as my physical body and our physical world/reality/existence.

I commit myself to walking this Journey to Life process in realizing that changing one thought and/or one personality of/as me as my mind as a consciousness system will not change me as my entire mind consciousness system, because, I see, realize and understand that in order to have effective real physical change requires self-commitment of consistent daily walking of writing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective application in order to change the entirety of my mind as a consciousness system in relation to my physical body within this physical world/reality/existence.

I commit myself to stop generating energy from within myself fueling the relationship between the mind and the physical – such as through believing in and participating in love/hate in/as feelings and emotions – thus, compromising my relationship to/as me as my physical body and our physical existence as a whole.

I commit myself to see, realize, understand and therefore show how the only way we’re going to actually change this earth, ourselves, our relationships and stop the direction of/as consciousness is through consistency within self-application as a substantial directive movement in manifesting individual standing within our mind-physical relationship every single day.

I commit myself to prepare myself to physically and mentally have the patience, the will, the courage and directive principle and absolute trust to stand as whatever point and decision is necessary to walk as the change required within and as our world/money system into alignment with the physical existence and humanity as a whole in coming together as a group to manifest a World according to what’s best for All.

(Please read Heaven’s Blog with regards to: Quantum Consciousness Programming in Childhood – Part 1: Day 99 and Quantum Consciousness Programming in Childhood – Part 2: Day 100)

(Please read Creation’s Blog: Day 74: Stopping the MIND IN THE FLESH – Part 1 and Day 76: Stopping the Mind in the Flesh – Part 2)

Day 95: Flesh

Continuation from Day 94: Establishing a Relationship – –

With still having a fever my flesh feels very warm and causes me to ask myself ‘what is it like to be the flesh of me as my physical body’ and, I realize, it’s not been easy, because I’ve been quite the abuser of and as it…

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have never considered what it’s like to be the flesh of me as my physical body because I’ve always existed through and as my mind where for my entire life I’ve existed looking down on myself within my mind with my head hanging in shame because of how and what I was accepting and allowing myself to participate in within the secrets of me as my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rarily use the word flesh because I’ve held an idea/definition of the word flesh within me in separation where I’ve associated the word flesh with cannibalism.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold an idea/definition of the word flesh as that of eating itself which is exactly how and what happens the more we become constructs as systems of/as our mind as consciousness, which integrates into and as our physical body/flesh/bone and completely takes over until eventually the physical body starts decaying as it eats away at itself in order to survive and thus how we age and die.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind as a weapon against me as my physical body/flesh and bone through participating in/as energetic charges of/as emotions and feelings from the starting point of self-interest, competition and desire of how I wanted to experience myself.

I forgive myself that have accepted and allowed me as my physical body to be directed from/as my mind as consciousness within the starting point of self-interest which has been purely result driven and not for the benefit of creating a world according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to always look for what is best for me as my mind without looking for what is best for me as my physical body and/or for what is best for Our Physical Reality according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to indulge in sadness and sorrow of and as my mind as memories/characters while never considering the effects upon my physical body as I would cloke myself in/as suits as sorrowful memories/characters within a dragging, sinking experience which accumulates, manifests and shapes me as my physical body accordingly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed me as my internal organs to exist in sorrow whereas pain as indigestion results from suppressing myself in/as the defense of anger in self isolation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never question and investigate how who I’ve been as my mind as memories/characters/personalities have manifested as pressure, pain and manifested consequences within and as my physical body,flesh and bone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand the extent of how, what I physically experience within my physical body has actually manifested me into certain character/personality constructs of/as my mind which I alone have kept myself within through my participation in and as them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to develop certain memories/characters/personalities of/as my mind in relation to my relationships and in relation to my world where me as my physical body has shaped accordingly to said memory/character and personality relationships within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never actually realize the relationship between who I am within myself with regards to me as memories/characters/personalities and how I have utilized my physical body in relationship between my mind and my physical body to the extent of manifesting and creating ailments, illness, disease, discomfort and pain and in how they are produced according to who I am as my mind as consciousness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how the role of our current world/money system is to keep us enslaved to it through the struggle and pain of survival of which we support willingly through what we accept and allow in/as our participation and direction of our mind as consciousness as memories/characters/personalities which manifest and create physical consequences within and as our physical bodies and thus our physical reality/existence.

to be continued

(Please read Heaven’s Blog with regards to: Quantum Consciousness Programming in Childhood – Part 1: Day 99 and Quantum Consciousness Programming in Childhood – Part 2: Day 100)

(Please read Creation’s Blog: Day 74: Stopping the MIND IN THE FLESH – Part 1 and Day 76: Stopping the Mind in the Flesh – Part 2)

Day 94: Establishing a Relationship

Beginning last night and all of today – I’ve been experiencing fever and more pain than usual throughout my physical body – thus the following self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become fearful when I experience pain in/as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to reach for drugs when I experience pain within my physical body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to throughout my life abuse pain medications and prescription medicines which may or may not have been harmful to me as my internal organs within and as my physical body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to never have considered nor understood the purpose of pain in and as me as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to consider how my mind as thinking and participating in/as emotions and feelings and internal reactions have impacted me as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand the relationship between my body and my mind in how the mind contributes to my experiences and manifestations of pain.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how pain in and as me as my physical bodies influences my life decisions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not comprehend how physical pain, discomfort and ailments are a consequence which I have created and manifested within my physical body over an extended period of time.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to in/as ego allow me as my mind as consciousness to become a physical consequence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to consider how when I access memories/thoughts in/as emotions and feeling charges where I physically experience emotions and feelings that are actually charged within components of/as mind constructs – how within such participation in/as them, I create an actual physical effect upon me as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how every single thought has an emotional-feeling charge to it as a resonance where it resonates like a ripple effect through and within and as my entire physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live my life so consumed in/as my mind of/as thoughts and dreams of how I wanted to experience myself according to how and what my mind as consciousness in/as emotions/feelings/memories/characters and personalites wanted and desired, that I completely ignored me as my physical body.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how the mind consciousness system acts like a parasite to the human physical body in that as the systems integrate into our physical body it extracts the nutrients of/as our physical body to reproduce itself into mind energy, thus the more we participate in/as emotions and feelings, thoughts, memories, etc., the more we become constructs as systems of/as our mind as consciousness, which evolves, expands and integrates into and as our physical body, thus why the relationship as the mind to the physical body completely takes over until we eventually as the physical body start decaying as it eats away at itself in order to survive and thus how we age and die.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to physically crawl up into a ball within feelings of lonesomeness and thoughts of how, ‘so and so’ betrayed me, Not seeing, realizing and understanding that the only betrayal was the betrayal of me in participating within my mind while neglecting to cherish me as who I am within and as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have never actually established a relationship with me as my Human Physical Body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand what mind processes are involved with creating and manifesting physical consequences – in order to Stop the mind consequence – and align myself to and as Physical Living.

to be continued

(Please read Heaven’s Blog with regards to: Quantum Consciousness Programming in Childhood – Part 1: Day 99 and Quantum Consciousness Programming in Childhood – Part 2: Day 100)

Day 93: CONditions of Acceptance

The point of anger towards self according to my acceptance was a point I was able to direct and breathe through today. This is a point I’ve been investigating within myself for awhile with regards to how and what I give acceptance to. Thus sharing here Self-Forgiveness. – –

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire and want acceptance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place CONditions of my acceptance of how life exists here based on my personal survival/money system.

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to hide myself within and as characters of/as my mind in acceptance of/as specific requireMENts of me in order to maintain a relationship.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to through fear of loss, accept self validation through others acceptance of me according to how I support their ideas and opinions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forsake the acceptance of me as my physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how when I place acceptance inside me as my physical body from the starting point of comparison and greed, I create stress which erupts upon the flesh of me as my Physical Body.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how accepting and placing conditions within and upon our Physical Bodies/Reality and limiting support to only those who can pay – creates separation as who we are as our Physical Bodies/Reality, thus we All Pay the price in that to Neglect & Abuse any part of our Physical Bodies/Reality is the same as neglecting and abusing All of us as our Physical Bodies/Reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear Not being accepted by others when speaking up for what I see and realize in equal understanding of how All life must be supported in order to Stop suffering and create Heaven on Earth with Equal Money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to as a child accept a decision within the context of acceptance and allowance as being the consequence of a decision I made based on how I reacted within a moment in my reality – where within that, I wasn’t actually making a decision according to who I actually am within myself – according to how I was going to walk my life in this world – instead I accepted the consequence of my reaction to become my actual relationship to my reality in separation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how what I have perceived as me making decisions as who I am within my life have only actually been acceptances and allowances according to our world/money system/friends/family, etc, thus, my decisions have been based on my relationship to my past/memories/personalities.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist within a ‘holier than thou’ attitude in/as a character/personality to/towards our entire world/money system in believing it to be evil, instead of realizing how the entire world/money system is merely reflecting the evil that I exist as through and as my own acceptance and allowance.

I forgive myself for how I have accepted and allowed myself to create relationships toward the world and people that has impacted my ability, my physical movement and direction in/as my future on this earth, according to my specific point of acceptance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept our current world/money system from the perspective of my own experiences, according to how I exist – where I have money and the ability to feed, clothe and provide for myself and within that I failed to consider how almost half the world — over three billion people — live on less than $2.50 a day – and this I’ve been willing to Not only Accept, I’ve also Allowed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to through Not questioning how and what I’m giving acceptance to – live as evil, denying what I’m allowing through shame of how and what is here manifested and created within our world as us, and thus the reason why we’ve not actually ever stood up and taken self-responsibility for ourselves as our physical bodies and our physical reality/world/existence.

When and as I see myself existing within a point of desire in wanting acceptance, I stop. I Breathe. I see, realize and understand that to do so is actually existing in self-denial and I am no longer willing to accept that as who I am.

I commit myself to stop placing conditions on what I’m willing to accept and allow and instead realize that acceptance of self is real when self accepts life on Earth living according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to stop hiding in/as characters/personalities of as my mind as consciousness where I place requirements as comparison and judgment unto others and instead I see, realize and understand how agreements as life according to what’s best for All is the only way to maintain a sense of harmoney in/as self.

I commit myself to see, realize and understand that I do not require acceptance – only self-acceptance in self-honesty living equal to and one with all here.

I commit myself to discover who I am as my physical body in full acceptance of/as life here within our physical reality/world/existence according to what’s best for All.

I Commit myself to show how what we give acceptance to is how/what we manifest and create as our World as the outer/physical reality reflecting the inner/physical reality.

I commit myself to prove to me that I am honest with me in every moment as self expression of inner awareness, where I am able to directly point out that which exist within others which is not who they are within and without, as knowing others are as me and not accepting and allowing anything less than who they are as me as life, living according to what’s best for All.

(Please read Heaven’s Blog with regards to: The 1% that Controls All Choice: DAY 89)