I don’t want to talk about it anymore. But yet, I do. I see how I’m searching for some commonality within myself where I can specifically relate to the Beast within me as Breast Cancer – that something that will end the separation that I am experiencing within myself towards it – the lump. Who am I now that CANCER has proven itself to be a definite part of my anatomy?
The plan is to get to know who I am as my body/mind/physical, to do whatever is necessary to assist myself to face that which I fear the most. Death… The monster in the dark, the beast in the night. Strange…
I was always scared that something ‘out there’ was gonna kill me but I failed to comprehend that ‘what’s out there’, exist first ‘in here’ – as my imagination, my thoughts, the energy of ups and downs, the feelings, the emotions, the secrets within and as my mind…
I forgive myself for the the inner definition of myself as the monster under the bed / the demon in the closet / the beast in the night / self-judgment / imagination / the lump / breast cancer and Death and within that, I commit myself to take self-responsibility to change the inner behavior of myself to stop the bully within by Giving first to others that which I’d like to Receive.
“When you treat a disease, first treat the mind.” ~Chen Jen
There are moments when I am reflective, where I look around me and take everything in. Where I can hear and follow what’s being said by 3 adults and 2 year old, all talking at once – and it’s oddly-comforting as I’m recognizing within me to keep it simple you have to breathe.
“What cancer does is, it forces you to focus, to prioritize, and you learn what’s important.” Gilda Radner
“You are in this World, because: You Have No Responsibility, No Integrity and because you have Never Cared about Life in the Universe throughout All Time. You are, in a way, in a Prison. A Prison you created for yourself. You’re Not Going to Get out of This one…not here or in the hereafter without facing consequence, taking responsibility for it and changing for oneself and so for all as self.” – Bernard Poolman
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold myself back in fear of exposing the truth of me and within that I commit myself to stop pre-judging myself as I Direct myself to walk in courage the willingness to be self-honest and Stable as I walk this Journey to Life.
“We don’t know how strong we are until being strong is the only choice we have.” ~Unknown
So, most of us have a clear definition of what it means to be ‘Strong’. It goes without saying that we all want to be a survivor. But, I’m no more willing to define myself as the strong struggling to survive. I commit myself to investigate for myself realistically – for instance, how does me having breast cancer support our current world/money system? Is my participation as a living being supporting Life according to what’s Best for All or am I a committed supporter of Profit/ Consciousness / Money / Enslavement/ Death?
I mean even the NFL is profiting off of Breast Cancer. Did you know that Breast Cancer Charities, Companies Raise $6 Billion DOLLARS A Year?
For Context Read:
How big business cashes in on breast cancer: Junk food, Barbie dolls and even power tools are jumping on this month’s pink ribbon bandwagon
Ok, Will continue to investigate and share how Cancer is Big Business. Because seriously, at this rate there is No way a cure will ever be approved. There are far to many Major Corporations who are getting rich from those of us who have cancer. In order for the rich to exist the poor and the dying must exist. We can’t have one without the other. Rich people vs Poor people – Why in the world is such a thing accepted and allowed? Because someone somewhere is getting Rich!
Imagine. If Equal Money were in place, our entire experience of Breast Cancer would change to one where the life of every individual is considered – instead of the only motive for care being based on profit – it would be based according to what’s Best for All and that’s where everything changes as Life on Earth.
I Commit myself to take self-responsibility for myself and Stop participating within my mind in positive and negative energetic experiences and in doing so I commit myself to investigate the consequences for what I’ve accepted and allowed myself to be and become as them.
“Human Rights would be the Recognition that All Life is Equal in Each One. It would be the Recognition that the Environment Determines the Outcome of a Life on Earth. Human Rights would be that Every One Born has a Right to the Resources on Earth as Food, Shelter, Water, Sunshine – the things that are Freely Available on Earth, then must simply be Managed to the Benefit of All. Human Rights Should be that No Political Agenda May Exist that will Interfere or Diminish the Right of Any Single Human on Earth and/or that can Limit the Right to Life of any single human on earth in any way whatsoever.” Bernard Poolman