Day 189: Self-fulfilling Prophecy

Last night I had a dream where I saw someone whose face was blurry and unrecognizable,  yet someone I very much desired attention from . In the dream,  I was aware of how I wanted the person to see me, want me, fulfill and complete me. As the dream was ending I saw a thought/image of myself sitting on the floor with my knees up and my arms wrapped around my legs with my head bent down in disbelief because I realized the person with the blurred face and unrecognizable was me.

hunger
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the negative emotional charges as an experience within me that feels lost and lonely within and as the idea of what if no one sees me, desires and/or wants me.

I forgive myself for the thought/image of myself looking, seeking, longing for attention wherein I desire to be seen, wanted, fulfilled and completed by something and/or someone outside of myself, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that that is how I avoid facing what I’ve become – the vampire who can’t get enough as I continue to suck the life out of me as my physical body and this physical reality through participating in and as negative and positive polarity emotions and feelings, believing I will reach a point of satisfaction when in fact it doesn’t exist,  because I AM that which I’ve been reaching for.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself living my life according to a belief thus influencing my actions and reactions where I allow expectations to foster behavior that consistently manifest the expectations.

I forgive myself for the thought/image of myself where I’m sitting on the floor with my knees up and my arms wrapped around my legs with my head bent down – where I’m existing within a state of emotional abandonment in realizing what I’ve accepted and allowed in and as characters/personalities and behaviors only ever looking for answers to my own self-fulfilling prophecy no different from living the law of attraction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I have internal conversation and back chat that says: ‘they don’t like me’ and/or ‘I’m not good enough‘, it’s because I’ve justified my behavior accordingly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel overwhelmed, almost lost like in not realizing that my reactions are actually towards a projection as an image or picture within my mind – not a real expression of me as who I am in and as my own process -but reaching for an image of myself for greatness – instead of me getting to know me in self-honesty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to experience myself as feeling physically famished, like a hunger and/or an emptiness within myself for how I have become in and as my attempt of living my own self-fulfilling prophecy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project future presentations of myself without yet forgiving and investigating and redesigning who I am because of having lived according to characters/personalities of/as the self-fulfilling prophecies of what I’ve accepted and allowed.

I commit myself to stop who I am and how I’ve existed in and as living my own self-fulfilling prophecy, where in self-interest and desire I’ve pursued life within the beliefs and ideas of what can I do, what can I have, what can I buy and get and/or what can I be in order that I may be happy.

I commit myself to stop the dreams of and as my mind of what might have been and realize that ‘Might’ keeps me locked into the past of emotions, feelings and moods, thus, I commit myself to stop manipulating myself through thoughts into words which I’ve perceived to be acceptable and to instead direct my thoughts to become a living expression of who I choose to be as an expression of life within and as a practical living example that will ensure that everyone have a right to life according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to face the fear of facing the nature of who I’ve become as my thoughts and to allow myself to direct my thoughts as what I’ve accepted and allowed myself to become to that which is able to walkas the directive principle of self according to and as the principle of equality.

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Suggested blogs to follow:
Creation Journey to Life
Heaven Journey to Life
Earth Journey to Life

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