Day 177: Jumping to Conclusions – Part 2

This blog is a continuation to: Day 176: Jumping to Conclusions
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I jump to conclusions about others it’s because I secretly fear being seen as a failure through the eyes of another as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I jumped to conclusion, what was really going on within me was that I was scared as hell to face what I saw as my own failure – failure and guilt for having gone through a divorce and within that I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I was a failure in the eyes of God, and for believing that I failed in the union of something sacred, the union of marriage.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have defined myself according to the word sacred and how I never realized hidden in the spelling and meaning is the word scared.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to jump to the conclusion that my step dad hated me and for the fear of being seen as a failure through the eyes of my parents.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I fear being seen as a failure,  I have a tendency to jump to conclusions and within that I forgive myself for rushing and seeking and desiring and always looking outside of myself for some form of energetic experience because I believed it would make me feel alive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I jump to conclusions I am actually accepting myself as having already failed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I reach for a conclusion it’s because who I am as my mind has reached outside of myself to transform a negative experience into a positive  experience because I have accepted the belief that it is what I need to set me free – when in fact, it is only I that can set me free through and as self-honesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I fear failure through the eyes of another it’s because within my mind I’m constantly competing all the while not realizing that I’m actually only ever in competition with myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I come to a point of conclusion that I am in that moment settling for a reasoning that begins within the starting point of self-interest and greed – instead of directing myself according to what’s best for All.

to be continued

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