Day 88 – 89: BeLonging

Continuation from: Day 87: Feels so good, Hurts so bad – –

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in/as an illusion of control to/towards my children/relationships, wherein the nature of who I am is one of thinking/believing that someone is mine, thus, I can raise my children however I please because, ‘they BELONG to me’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within a belief that I have the right to teach my child the same wants, needs and desires that I have existed as, wherein through fear, guilt, jealousy and an illusion of control, I have abused who I am as my physical body and my physical reality in order to have relationships/experiences according to my wants, needs and desires.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when my children were younger, to see my social life as more important than the life of my children, where I lacked preparing them to take self-responsibility for themselves and/as all life here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the importance of teaching my children how vital it is to investigate who we are as our physical body – instead of pursuing ourselves in/as Memories/characters/personalities according to how we’ve been pre-programmed from the lives of generations before us.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to be unable/unwilling to answer the question, ‘why did you bring a child into this world knowing full well the struggle of survival that the child will face being born within our current/world/money system’.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to in self-interest and greed not consider how – who we are as our mind as consciousness – is only out to satisfy and fuel itself as a way of keeping us enslaved to our current world/money system – how everything here is here to support the very EVIL we LIVE as, as that which we call life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to LIVE so wrapped up in/as my mind as thoughts, feelings and emotions, that it didn’t occur to me that I am the one who decides who I am and how and what I accept and allow, thus, whatever is here, is here only because I / We accept and allow it and therefore, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in/as characters/personalities of/as my mind, allowed myself to distract myself from seeing the pain and suffering existent as life on earth.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not walk as a living example for my children in teaching/showing/preparing them how to care for our physical bodies and our physical reality, including the animals and plants, our earth, the trees, our water, the air we breathe, and the dirt we walk on/as – within the realization of how we as our physical body and our physical reality is how we are able to exist here, thus, to abuse anyOne and/or anything, is to abuse All and everything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not fully comprehend how life here on earth is a living representation of how, who and what exists within the mind-physical body of/as the human.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how important it is to investigate/teach ourselves and our children to communicate with and as our physical body to understand the meaning of how/why we experience pain within and as it.


I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to through fear and guilt, avoided physical touch with/as my children as they grew older.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how when jealousy exists within me, then the illusion of control exist within me, because within the nature of jealousy toward another, I am actually trying to protect and defend/control my children/relationship within the context of how I want another to be with regards to how I want our relationship/experience to be – according to how I want to experience myself within the context of the relationship.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how through my mind as jealousy, I have existed in/as a state of demonism where I have accepted and allowed jealousy and control as me, and as such, I have accepted and allowed myself to be completely taken over in/as experiences of myself where jealousy and control take over the context of my relationships within and as me as my physical body and within our physical world/reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how in the very beginning of my relationships, I have accepted and allowed a pre-conceived idea, which I have superimposed onto my relationships according to how I want the relationship to be, thus, jealousy and control are the components I’ve used to keep the relationship going according to how I desire it to be, because I try and control the relationship by becoming jealous of others who I see as a threat toward my desire, want and need, in how I have intended the relationship to be within my illusion of control.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that within my illusion of control I fail to see that I am not in-fact in control of the relationship because within my illusion of control what I’m actually trying to do is to manifest and create into reality my wants, needs and desires which is the point behind control in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to motivate all of my relationships according to how I want, need and desire them to be and within that I believed myself as having control, when in fact I’ve only been supporting my own self-interest in/as my mind as consciousness in order to get and have experiences of myself according to how I want them to be and to hell with how anyone else has to experience themselves within this world/money system of/as poverty, starvation and greed.

i forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how I have let jealousy within the relationship of/as inferiority/superiority to control who I am within my relationship to/toward myself and others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to treat others as my belongings – in how I have created relationships over and over again through my wants, needs and desires as jealousy within the illusion of control in/as superiority and inferiority, where I feel inferior to that which I’ve not understood in how the relationship exists superior in relation to me in how and what I’m accepting and allowing and thus, I’ve continued to seek myself within the illusion of control.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately generate energy within myself for the purposes of having illusions within wants, needs, desires, control, jealousy and, superiority and inferiority – instead of seeing/realizing and understanding how me as my mind and my physical body within our physical reality, is here as a gift to assist and support our process of realizing who we are as Life, thus I forgive myself that I have taken for granted that which I am, as my physical body within this physical reality, and I direct myself here according to and in support of a world according to what’s best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a world/money system where children are not heard, seen, recognized, loved, noticed and/or wanted within this world because if they were, then every child born would be guaranteed a lifetime of food, a home, clean water, clothes, healthcare and a proper education.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be chased by desire, want and need to be important, to be noticed, to be recognized, to be appreciated, to be accepted, to be desired, to be loved and to be wanted – all of which are attributes within my mind as Ego, where I have placed myself on a pedestal in my own world, even before my children, and have ignored the atrocities that exist within this world, because of my idea as being more superior than everyone else within a less than idea of myself, within my mind as ego in how and what I’ve perceived according to how/what I was taught and learned as being the ‘right way’ and thus, I raised my children accordingly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am responsible for me as my mind and my physical body as well as how our physical world/reality exists, according to what I / We have accepted and allowed within a world/money system that is Not supportive of All living beings and, that I / We decide and determine how our world exists – as such I / We are able to Stop accepting and allowing abuse within our world/money system and to instead stand up as One Man One Vote in support of an Equal Money system, which will support All Life Equal in all ways.

to be continued

(Please read Heaven’s Blog with regards to: Parenting Building a Child’s Character)

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