Day 40: America is falling down

Recently, I had a dream in which I was in total darkness and within it I allowed a glimpse of myself. There was no fear and no reactions of any kind, no movement, no shapes, no sound or color. Only a clearer understanding of how I’ve ‘Lived’ as ‘Evil‘, and my suppression of myself within it – which has been a point that I’ve not really understood since beginning the Desteni Process. Strangely enough – this post and my self-forgiveness represents the beginning of my healing process from what I realized of myself within it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid facing the guilt and embarASSED impressions within myself of how I’ve accepted and allowed myself to continue to support a world/money system that goes to war over land and it’s resources no matter the number of babies caught in the crossfire because of our will to Fight for the right to consume the hell out of this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within hate towards the generations before me who sat quietly watching as we’ve raped our land for profit and tossed common sense to the wind because we believe we have a right to our opinion – when in fact the human is the cause for the death and misery brought by war by men against men in the race to be the best, biggest and richest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to once believe that I lived in the land of the free when in fact I live in the land of the evil where humanity knows no boundaries in it’s consuming within a game to see which slave can have more than the other slave.

I forgive myself that I have been willing to accept and allow life to exist in wars resulting in death and destruction as long as I have a job and money and a false sense of security where I don’t and/or won’t consider the countless number of those suffering and/or dying within our world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear forgiving what I see in self-honesty exists as evil within me because my mind has refused to see the destructive nature of myself as humanity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I live in a country that has the largest gap and inequality between rich and poor compared to all the other industrialized nations.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the insanity of trying to live what’s been called the American dream while the wealthiest 20% of the world’s population consumes 76.6% of the world’s goods while 80% of humanity gets the remainder.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to overlook an important part of my hate for how this world exists – which is that the evil I see within this world begins first within me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as I have went out of my way to be nice and make people happy what I’ve really been doing is setting up relationships to validate my ego and fuel the evil that I continue to accept and allow as I consume and compete against others, thus creating more and more evil as suffering, war, rape, murder, poverty and starvation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as complacent with myself wherein I have taken advantage of others without complete awareness of the dangers of my decision to regard one life form as less than another.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have not only been the abused but I have in fact been the abuser.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress myself within a point of being co-dependent upon the mental abuse of my secret mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the reality of how our world exists as evil to/towards life because I feared I couldn’t handle realizing what the hell I’ve accepted and allowed as who I’ve become as the evil that exists here within and as our current world/money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I deserved to live a better life than my neighbor and rejected my responsibility in manifesting a world where living life has always been about me in self-interest and my survival within our current money system.

I forgive myself for the greedy, self-centered and egotistical nature of who I’ve been as I’ve struggled to survive as a working class slave in a world where the wealthiest are wealthy because the poorest suffer and die while the working class slave remains clueless in America.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to celebrate Memorial Day to remember ‘the cost of American freedom’, when in fact it has taken me losing almost everything I had to realize that freedom really is just another word for nothing left to lose because the only freedom that exists is the freedom that comes with having and protecting ownership and money instead of protecting life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to convince myself that it’s alright to reject life through and as a world/money system which commits crimes daily against life through acts of war.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that an Equal Money System will allow all physical life forms to exist here together peacefully.

I commit myself to directing myself Not as an American but in Self-honesty as Mankind.

I commit myself to bring down the borders that exist within myself toward all nations of beings and to support a money/world system that sees to it that No one suffer as Life.

I commit myself to supporting a system of Equality where money is Not here to devalue life but is instead here for the sole purpose of Supporting Life on Earth.

I commit myself to a system that does not capitalize the resources of the land for profit but instead realizes the resources of the land are here to access within the principle of and according to what’s best for all.


Please read the following blogs for further perspectives and self-support:

Creation’s Journey to Life

Heaven’s Journey to Life

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