It could be anyone’s story but this is not a story, it is true. June of last year – a man who we’ve known only barely, who had been married for 50 years became ill and within a few weeks he died. Six months before he died him and his wife and their daughter were in a car accident within miles from their home in front of a convenience store and the wreck totaled their car. Now since he has died his wife has began to realize the debt they are in and has been shocked as she had no clue about their finances. In the past six months she has found more and more debt but the biggie she just found recently. Six months and two days to the day that he was admitted to the hospital he had took out a loan at a nearby bank for $10,000 and this was also within days of their car accident. She knew nothing about the loan and the bank note she found recently read that payment in full was due six months later and until that date no payments were scheduled.
So two days before the loan amount was due to be paid in full, the man became deathly ill and never left the hospital. Further investigation has found that a woman he had an affair with some 26 years prior showed the facts, which were tightly contained in a box tucked far in his garage as proof the affair had in fact continued for how long no one knows for sure but the ‘letters’ from the woman stopped four years ago, which meant he still had 26 years worth of letters. The letters were all sent from various locations and nearby towns. His wife had known of the affair but was told by him at the time that he had ended it when she found out about it
The car wreck that they had six months before he became ill and died, happened in front of the convenience store where he had met the woman he had began the affair with. There is still no evidence of where he spent the $10,000 he borrowed and the bank has never contacted her since he died regarding the debt.
When this man was alive, it was common to hear him say, and he said it often, with regards to his wife, how she was the ‘love’ of his life. She recently said if he were to walk through the front door that she wouldn’t know whether to hug him or yell at him. And that she had children with this man and spent 50 years of her life with him yet, she didn’t know him at all. She has also found out that their son as well as the pastor of their church and many members of their church were aware of his deceptions but that no one had cared to tell her.
Proof here how radical relationships exist. How money, abuse, neglect, hate and pure self terror leaves a trail and provides the clear meaning represented all in the name of ‘love’ within our radical relationships.
I am as guilty as any with regards to how we participate within and as the secrets of our mind and how we exist here in this life as them and then we die as them. It is no wonder our physical body dies because of our radical relationships and the dishonesty we exist as within them. The secrets that we hold so dearly and fear and don’t want anyone to know about, are really not so secret.
I was grateful when I heard Bernard Poolman’s video today called; ‘Radical Relationships as Creative Force ‘, and it has became clearer to me the impact that relationships have upon our lives. We trap and protect our relationships within our mind and the dishonesty we accept and allow as such becomes our self directive principle. We support the make believe world of our mind and we are directed and enslaved by our ego. It’s rather disturbing when one begins to realize what we are protecting in our dishonesty within our mind illusion and the impact it’s creating in the lives all around us. This includes all relationships and the way we believe we are seeing them which is within our mind within all our mind beliefs. Including our relationship with our partner, our children, our relatives, our friends, our employer, and a even a person who calls himself the pastor of a church. All is relevant.
I see the point that I must face within my relationship with the man I call my husband. I am clearer now and I am prepared to face myself within what I have avoided which will ultimately bring us both more effective support for each other in remaining here as the physical and breath. We have together been facing points together. However, today I see in self honesty a point opened up for me that has been a point of resistance within myself. In self honesty and self forgiveness as well as self-willed action with regards to the point of resistance, I will stop. As I accumulate and prove this for myself I will share as self support.
Suggest hearing the following video by Bernard Poolman. Give a gift to yourself.