Day 195: See The Blind Spot

I just finished watching the documentary “Blind Spot” which illustrates clearly the current oil and energy crisis we are facing within our world. This stuff, it should  be broadcast over and over on every television station until we freakin get it because seriously, we’re in deep shit trouble.  The documentary is very educational and it sums up the unbelievable amount of ignorance and greed that we as a humanity exist as as we continue to burn fossil fuels – which are sucking the life out of our planet earth – while we continue to consume our way to oblivion.

I mean, I get it. I get how we become so consumed in our race to survive that we actually tell ourselves that everything is going to be okay when clearly it isn’t. I see now how absurd the things I believed in were according to the ideas and opinions I’ve existed as according to my mind, and it’s downright disgraceful how I’ve taken the gifts given for Everyone from our Physical Reality for granted.

We are going to have to begin to understand who we are as our mind.  Like how and why we think and feel and react in repeating patterns over and over so we can stop who we’ve become and see who we can be through self-forgiveness and self-honesty.

I’ve lived in America my entire life. I come from a middle class family where electricity comes with the convenience of flipping a switch and a seemingly clean glass of water to drink, is a given – well, that is if one has money to pay for them.

I never questioned how the things I always ‘believed’ was ‘my right’ to have – such as water and heat and lights –  I never questioned what would I do if that which I’ve taken for granted were suddenly no longer here to be had?  I never questioned the amount of work/money that was involved in order for me to have water and heat/electricity, nor did I ever question how much money my parents paid every month to huge corporations just so we could have them.

I certainly never questioned or considered the thousands, no millions of people who don’t have either electricity, heat or clean water simply because they aren’t able to pay for it.

I never had a clue as to how our world/money system currently, actually function.

It doesn’t make sense how the every day things that we each one require to survive  - like food and water and heat and electricity/energy – how these life essentials are not even talked about amongst parents and children.  And children certainly aren’t educated or given a solution that will ensure that Life itself will always be able to sustain itself.  Why is that not a top priority?

I’ve lived my life as an energetic fiend. Always taking from what is here instead of giving and assisting in maintaining and supporting life here according to what’s best for all.  The first time I actually began to seriously question my reality, my world, was just over 5 years ago when I first began to hear and read the massive amounts of material offered through Desteni.

It was their message that encouraged me to educate myself as to how our world/money system functions and to investigate the part that self plays within it all and to stand up and take self-responsibility for our world.

I admit that it has not been easy to look in the mirror, to investigate what I’ve accepted and allowed to exist within our world,  but I can also say for a fact that it was way harder to remain stuck in my mind of make beLIEf than it’s been to face, forgive and begin to assist myself to be able to assist in bringing about a world that is best for all.

I seriously challenge anyone reading this to do the same.

See The Blind Spot  and Investigate Equal Money
—
Suggested blogs to follow:
Creation Journey to Life
Heaven Journey to Life
Earth Journey to Life
Economist Journey to Life

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Day 182: It’s Not Personal – it’s PERSONALITY

“Whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal.” ~ Meg Ryan from the movie ‘You’ve Got Mail’

I used to believe that I loved that quote from the movie ‘You’ve Got Mail’, because I believed that’s how it should be between people. Personal. I’ve since realized how the whole idea of being in a personal relationship with another person has been nothing more than personal conflicts – conflicts of personalities.

When we take things personal, it’s because within our mind we’re acting according to whatever character or personality we’re existing as – where we have a complete storyline going on within our mind as we participate in thoughts, feelings and emotions which we beLIEve to be real. We don’t realize how the story begins and ends in self-interest and ego while we’re busy existing in and as the energy that it takes to maintain the experience we believe we’re having.

So the point I’m looking at here is personality and experience – which began with fear.  Fear that began when my partner communicated to me his recent thoughts – which he’d been stopping, but nevertheless thoughts he’d been having with regards to his desire to receive attention from female coworkers – which he realized is/was an attempt to validate his own negative experience to change it into a positive one.  As he shared with me,  I thought it was very cool,  and I was pleased with how we were communicating.

But then, later that night when I went to sleep, I woke up after having a dream where there was only a brief image, an image of my partner in the arms of someone else, an image that in my past I had often been aware of but had always dismissed it but after seeing it in my sleep I noticed how I was suppressing myself and how I was left with a gloomy depressed feeling that I can not trust anyone.

As I’ve been walking this process, one thing I know for sure is that everything I experience within and without is a direct reflection of myself.  And I realize that I’ve never been able to trust myself, yet, I see how my mindset changed towards my partner and I realize that I have to investigate this point further because I see how I’m pulling away and separating myself further and further from him. Which means I’m pulling away and separating myself further from myself.

I also noticed the internal conversation/ backchat within my mind that was repeating – where I was telling myself over and over: ‘it’s not personal’. Yet, the many character’s and personalities that I exist as within my mind ‘felt’ that it was very personal.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the origin of personality begins in/with fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take things personal because I see, realize and understand that what ‘feels’ personal is in conflict with a personality I’m existing as within and as my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ‘fear’ rejection and within that I forgive myself for not realizing that when I fear rejection it’s because I accept myself as imperfect, unsatisfactory, and/or useless and powerless, thus I forgive myself for judging myself through the eyes and ears of consciousness as fear and comparison of not being good enough.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being alone, unwanted with no way to provide for myself and within that not realizing that when I accept the fear of being alone and unwanted and fearful that I wouldn’t be able to provide for myself, it’s because I don’t trust myself and instead of investigating myself in self-honesty as to why and how come I don’t trust myself, I project that separation/fear onto others – when the fact is, when I direct myself in self-honesty according to what’s best for all and catch a glimpse of what it is to Not exist in separation from myself and others as myself, that’s when I comprehend how the fear of self/others diminish, and I begin to establish a point of self-trust.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how when I pursue someone/something for energy, such as love and happiness, that within my pursuit of ‘it’ I’m separating myself from myself as ‘it’, thus ‘it’ (for example: love and happiness) becomes more than me, thus why I exist in fear of and am able to be controlled and directed by ‘it’ as me as my mind as consciousness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a thought/image within my mind of my partner smiling in the arms of someone else, and I see how the image is important because when I see that image within my mind, I experience guilt and shame, because within that image holds a memory of myself as my own past behavior and the deceptive nature I once existed as, thus, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deceive myself and my partner as I tried to escape from the negative depressed state of mind and experience I was having of myself by seeking for attention outside our relationship as a way of validating myself and thus providing myself with a positive energy experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as a character/personality of and as my mind where I am only concerned about whether or not I am having a positive energy experience – one which serves it’s purpose by stroking my own ego and for the depths of evil that I have existed as within my mind when/as I’m am seeking for attention, just so I can try and believe that I’m having the ultimate experience – one where all I want to do is to relieve myself from feeling negative, so much so, that I haven’t stopped and considered the consequences of my experience and how it manifests in the lives of others within and as my world/reality/existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine a “I told myself so’ attitude towards my partner, where in fear I believe I can’t trust him and thus I imagine myself walking away and informing him that I will not be mistreated, that I would rather be alone and within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my imagination in this plays out exactly how I have existed as towards myself, where when I realize I am facing the consequences of what I have accepted and allowed as my past and my behavior, that I will hide within myself and pout and feel sorry for myself and as such I can’t forgive myself and thus I never reach a point of real substantial change within, and as a result I continue repeating the same mindset/patterns over and over and the results are manifested within and as me as my physical body and world/reality/existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I have internal conversation and back chat that says: ‘It’s not personal” and ‘he can’t be trusted’ that what I am doing is accepting myself within a point of self-denial where I distract myself through judging others because I secretly judge myself for not facing myself and directing myself in self-honesty within and as a point of self-correction and self-change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame and condemn my partner as being the reason for my perception of myself as being unhappy, because I see, realize and understand that I have existed within the belief that in order for me to be happy then I must have a positive energetic experience, and if I am having a negative experience then I must be unhappy and within that, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not investigate the true nature of my thought participation which will assist me to understand how and why I experience myself the way that I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live as an abdication of self and life in such denial that I will manifest within my stomach a sinking feeling and a feeling of nausea, therefore, I commit myself to stop existing in self-denial through living behind the characters and personalities of and as my mind as memories and patterns that I realize are preprogrammed from my parents and society, and to instead commit myself to stop manifesting the physical consequences of self-dishonesty by committing myself to myself in self-honesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to physically manifest the consequences within and as my physical body of and as infection due to how I have existed in and as rejection where I deny myself as who I’ve been and what I’ve accepted and allowed as evil and abuse to continue to exist within and as myself and my world as myself.

I commit myself to when I feel fear to stop and investigate who I am as it.

I commit myself to stop taking things personally and if and when I see that I am taking something personal, I stop, I breathe – instead I slow myself down and bring it back to self to see how and what self is existing as, to thus forgive and walk the self-corrective application to redesign what self has accepted and allowed and realign self with and as all as one as equal.

I commit myself to realize that I have always existed as some sort of character and/or personality because that is how I have hid from myself in fear, and I see, realize and understand that in self-honesty I am able to redirect myself to reach a point of self-intimacy and establish self-trust.

I commit myself to breathe and become aware of and forgive myself for when I’m searching for and/or existing in negative and positive energy experiences.

I commit myself to changing myself through Desteni I Process and walking the Journey to Life because I see, realize and understand that it is only through changing myself within, that I will be able to walk as a living example and effectively support a world according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to STOP seeking attention because in seeking I am stroking my ego and existing in self-interest which is unacceptable, thus, I commit myself to breathe and walk with gratitude for/as self.

I commit myself to stop rejecting myself and my world as myself in fear of what I may discover.

Day 129: Money System Shows No Mercy

Walking the Self-forgiveness here for how I experienced myself today within our current world/money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a world/money system which supports us in finding new ways to hurt each other which is what we’re good at.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel ‘less than’ the woman sitting behind a desk at the dental office where I was making an appointment when I /she realized that I didn’t have the’ exact’ amount of money to pay as a deposit for the major dental work that I am needing.


I forgive myself for not realizing how I belittle myself in/as fear when I don’t have enough money for that which my physical body requires in order for it to function properly.

I forgive myself for not realizing how it only takes seconds for me to play out different scenarios within my mind with regards to how and what to say in order to manipulate/persuade someone into seeing things my way.

I forgive myself for not realizing how I react and interact within my physical reality with other human beings, where within my mind, I immediately scan, assess, compare, compete and contemplate how can I win over the person I’m communicating with in order to acheive the end result I’m seeking for, and within that, I forgive myself for not realizing the point where I stop having a physical reality relationship with another and instead begin having only a mind relationship with as/them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to change the tone of my voice when talking to another to one that will create an illusion of myself as being helpless and hopeless in order to prove my point of need.

I forgive myself for not realizing how we manifest and create a world/money system that we constantly support within the context of how we exist within our relationships with each other through our mind as consciousness – instead of who we are in total support of and as each other through and as our physical body and our physical world/reality/existence.

I forgive myself for not realizing that within our current world/money system we see each other as numbers and our number is dependent upon the amount of money we have in our pocket/bank account.

I forgive myself for the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach in realizing the seriousness of our world/money system where people are paying monthly premiums for health and dental insurance yet can’t afford to pay the deductible and/or the pre-payment to cover what their insurance won’t pay.

I forgive mysef that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience anger towards our world/money system that labels people as argumentative and insensitive when one questions the policies, procedures and rules of a system that shows No Mercy except for the minority who have All the money, while the Majority of Us, have settled for remaining slaves to the very Money System that CANNOT exist without OUR CONTINUED SUPPORT.

I forgive myself for not realizing how we are completely at the Mercy of our word/money system where we are locked into a reality of money within a mind-reality supported in/as energy and as that, we have No consideration or regard for each other and/or for our existence as a whole.

I commit myself to stop separating myself from our current world/money system in realizing that I am equal to and one with how and what exists here, thus, it is my responsibility to show how the Solution of Equal Money will be that which will end who we are as slaves and thus stop that which what we have resisted in separation of as Life itself.

I commit myself to support a solution that will end all suffering and abuse and thus create relationships that are supportive of who we are as our physical bodies and our physical reality.

I commit myself to communicate with me as my physical body, to thus support our physical reality in assuring that life on earth become that which supports the physicality of every living being with the utmost support possible.

I commit myself to show how humanity is a slave to and as consciousness where we’ve accepted and allowed our mind to direct us and have thus not yet realized that we have manifested Hell on Earth and how with Equal Money we are able to support All living beings to live life in dignity.

I commit myself to show how our current world/money system does not have to continue as it is where the majority are slaves to the few who have everything, to thus show how through the Peaceful Solution of Equal Money we Can/Will manifest Heaven on Earth.

Day 127: The World Revolves Around Me Character

I forgive myself for not realizing how within the perception of myself within my head region as a mind consciousness system, I exist as one who has been so lacking in self-trust and within the inability to take self-responsibility, that I have lived my life insisting and demanding and crying out for the world to see me, notice me, love me, and above all else, revolve around me and me only.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to as a character of/as my mind have desired the world to revolve around me and within that have become a master manipulator in order to satisfy my minds perception of control through abusing others in order to ensure that those within my world will see me as I desire them to see me as an object of their affection/attention to thus further my desire to control who I am within ‘the world revolves around me character.

I forgive myself for not realizing the extent of my fear when looking within myself to the loss of image when asking myself who will I be and how will I act if I’m not noticed and loved by someone/anyone and how within that I have neglected the necessary adjustments and upkeep of me as my physical body in fear that if I change and/or don’t change certain physical attributes of my physical body that I may then be seen as less desirable and thus my perception of how my world must revolve around me will change and I’ll become a feared version of/as a character of myself as nothing more than the girl interrupted.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing backchat within my mind to continue as the words of: ‘I am better than her/him’, so why am I not being seen first’ – where within myself as those words, I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in/as ego and spite and, when I look closer, I see that I am actually attempting to gain the attention of myself – to hear and see how the loneliness and frustration that I have existed as is the direct result of seeking approval and validation outside of myself which only leads to a simulated version of myself, where I’m never able to reach a point of fulfillment, thus, I see, realize and understand that life is not about being ‘filled up’ with/as more, but is instead about slowing myself down and breathing, to be a living expression that is not revolving, but that stands firm as an equal and one awareness in full commitment to remain standing as support for/as a world according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself being patted on the back for a job well done wherein I am praised and honored for supporting those who are less fortunate, and within that, I see, realize and understand that it’s always been about how to ‘make myself feel special’ and/or to make myself look better than others which is just another way of stroking my ego, thus always trying to replace a negative experience of myself with a positive experience and within that remaining in separation from myself and abdicating myself from life itself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as a character of and as my mind to such a degree that I have acted as though the world revolves around me in how I’ve been lost within my mind of/as reactions of getting attention from others, where within my solar plexus it would feel as if there were butterflies as I experienced ‘feeling excited’ for being noticed, and how within that, I failed to consider what others were struggling with as they’ve fought to stay alive within our current world/money system.

I forgive myself for not realizing how when I exist as if the world revolves around me, that what I am really doing is accepting and allowing the worst case scenario to manifest for all life here on earth, because I see, realize and understand how it is through ego, self-interest, hate and greed that we are creating for ourselves a world full of and subject to that which we fear the most as the cancers of life and death.

I forgive myself for not realizing how within the characters which I become in order to fuel and ignite experiences first thought of within my mind as consciousness, how within that I’ve Not noticed the untold stories of abuse that exists within every walk of life here on earth, and how the reasons of my Not noticing the depth of despair being lived within our world is because I’ve only been interested in myself as my mind and how within my self-interest and greed I have forsaken that which matters the most as that which is real as our physical bodies and our physical world/reality/existence.

I commit myself to Stop filling myself up within and as an egotistical and manipultive perception of and as my mind to thus stop accepting and allowing myself as a character thereof to lead me into temptation to become of and as ego to such a degree that I am unable to see who I am as my physical body as that which supports me to remain here within this physical reality.

I commit myself to stop the fear that exists within me to/toward change and to instead face who I am in self-honesty free from fear within an idea of myself as the girl interrupted and according to a character of/as my mind where I have existed within a belief that my world must revolve around me and thus why I have sought self-glorification for nothing more but to fuel my mind as consciousness within a point of ego, self-interest and greed, instead of standing equal and one with and as my mind, and directing myself within and as and according to that which will support a world according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to stop who I am as ego and to instead walk a self-corrective process of realizing myself here free from energetic charges of and as experiences, to thus then become willing support for a system that will support our world according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to investigate what it’s like to walk in the shoes of those who have no home to relax in and no clean water to replenish their physical body and within that I commit myself to show others the extent of the abuse that is experienced daily by thousands who are silently trying to make it through another day.

I commit myself to becoming equal to and one with my mind.

I commit myself to me as my physical body and our physical reality, to investigate and educate for myself how an Equal Money System is the Solution that will provide complete assistance and support in order to sustain Life on/as Heaven on Earth according to what’s best for All.

Day 121: Paybacks

Read the following for context: More than 20,000 spared jail reoffend: Alarming figures ‘prove community service isn’t working’ -

I forgive myself for not realizing how we as a humanity have been suffering from our acceptance and allowance of environmental impulses as the result of an unequal system wherein we live out our lives in/as paybacks, thus, I forgive myself for not realizing that the rules of law within our unequal world/money system is/has always been that of slavery, no matter the sentencing spared – because for the already down and out – where ‘doing time’, is in fact all any of us have ever known – to be spared jail in place of having to work, is just another sentencing to/as a slave within our world/money system, which doesn’t honor one another as being substantial parts of the community.

I forgive myself for not realizing how paying the consequences for how one has to survive – such as overworked and under paid – when one is uneducated and underskilled proves just how corrupt our world/system is – in how the enslaved/poor often have no real clue of what they’re being charged to payback and how many have lived out their lives in defense mode, dumbed down, where we/they have believed we/they can’t assist ourself to establish a point of self-trust because of constantly blaming and/or our constant competing against each other to survive.

I forgive myself for not realizing that when the only motivation for living is one of constant struggle for money within an unequal system, then the natural order of the enslaved society will be one of desperation within feelings of betrayal – where people feel that they don’t matter anyway so why consider taking self-responsibility for a system that remains unequal.

I forgive myself for not realizing how what I think, feel and fear is how and what I am accepting and allowing as an energetic representation of/as me which has always been within the starting point of self-interest and greed.

I forgive myself for not realizing that punishment and fines has not and never will be the solution for a world/money system as the one we exist in, where there is suffering, overworked and misplaced people who are running on stress in every direction just trying to survive their enslavement. Thus, I commit myself to show how people are only acting in/as the product of their enslavement and that it is going to take coming together peacefully as a GROUP to Support a Solution for Life according to what’s best for All, and how the Only Solution is that of Equal Money.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I am a victim to/of our current world/money system and for living in fear and self-doubt.

I commit myself to show how through self-forgiveness, I am able to overcome victimization and stand in/as a group in support of an Equal Money System to once and for all bring an end to enslavement.

I commit myself to comprehend and thus assist others to understand how/what it is we’ve created, to bring an end to our manifested consequences of/as suffering and pain, to thus Stop who we are as the uneducated and dumbed down and to see that We are the ONE who Decides who we are, that we Are capable of manifesting Heaven on Earth through Equal Money.

I commit myself to support a system where every Human Being is given adequate Education and the proper skills to be able to enjoy all the amenities of living a life in/as dignity.

I commit myself to a world economic system wherein the definition of ‘Community Paybacks’ becomes Living expressions of “Love thy Neighbor as Thyself”.

I commit myself to a world economic system where people are not just working to live but instead are living in support of each other, equal to and one with their neighbors.

I commit myself to Forgive myself daily for that which I think, feel and fear and have accepted and allowed, to thus stop the representation of/as me within the starting point of self-interest and greed.

I commit myself to direct myself daily in self-honesty in order to stop and see what the hell I’ve become within and as the roles of/as characters and personalities which I am responsible for according to how our world/money system exists.

I commit myself to show how every single being within our existence matters Equally, and that what we have accepted and allowed can and WILL change with Equal Money – through a Democratic system of One Man, One Vote, where the method of Voting Will matter, and Life on Earth will flourish, according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to let All be Dignified within this World through Equal Money.

Day 117: The Right to Die

Tears of desperate locked-in syndrome sufferer Tony Nicklinson as High Court rules he CAN’T ask a doctor to end his life - -

The above article is about a 58-year-old father of two who is mentally sound but paralyzed from the neck down and unable to speak. For two years he’s been battling to persuade three judges of the High Court to rule that if and when he decides he wants to die, that doctors will be immune from prosecution if they help him to do so. Recently, he lost in his war for ‘the right’ to end his life.

His wife said her husband was ‘absolutely heartbroken’ because he’s been condemned by the law to ‘a life of increasing indignity and misery’.

It’s a strange thing to read, that someone is ‘fighting’ the laws of our current world/money system for the right to end one’s life so that they won’t have to suffer a life of ‘indignity and misery’. Because obviously, the laws of our current world/money system have already denied ‘the right for All to be able to live a life in dignity’ – where 30,000 plus children die a miserable death every single day from starvation.

Who the hell cares about their indignity and misery? They’re starving to death! They don’t have the luxury of a two year court battle to survive life.

There is something here we had better grasp – that how we experience ourselves within our world, is by our own creation as consciousness, which we agree to and manifest within our world accordingly.

Like it or not – we’re All responsible for how every single one of us experience life, whether that be through the suffering/misery resulting from having a stroke or the daily shocking statistics of 30,000 + children starving to death.

If there’s misery, pain, suffering, anguish and suppression amongst us, where one wishes they would die but are unable to – that is what it is as a direct result of our current world/money system. It’s time for us to realize that ALL challenges we face are according to what I / WE have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become.

The Question is – what have we accepted and allowed ourselves to become?

For Life on Earth to actually change – where No one suffers and every single life is given equal support and assistance according to individual needs – that require us to stop who we are in/as self-interest, ego and greed.

In order to provide effective life support according to what’s best for self, requires a system where we come together as a group, to take self-responsibility and support a world/money system according to what’s best for All.

There is ONLY ONE solution where peaceful change is possible, that is through an Equal Money System.

I commit myself to comprehend completely for myself to thus show how one cannot escape facing/forgiving self – because even in death self must take self-responsibility for Self as Life as All in All ways Equally.

I commit myself to Never stop supporting an Equal Money System which will provide All living beings with The Right to Experience LIFE in DIGNITY.

I commit myself to show how an Equal Money System will allow each one of us the ability to clarify and redefine ourselves through self-directed choices of/as self-responsibility for and as All Living beings.

I commit myself to show how with an Equal Money System, the Right of Life will give each individual being the right to exist in dignity in/as Heaven on Earth – where fighting to live and die will not be a battle nor even a QUESTion within the minds of men.

I commit myself to show how life within an Equal Money System will replace struggling to survive to that of Harmony Amongst Neighbors.

I commit myself to Life in Equality as Heaven on Earth wherein ego, greed and self-interest become obsolete as expressions.

I commit myself to Life in Equality as Heaven on Earth where Equal Money will pave the way for Peace and a Dignified Life for All.

Day 115: Expect the Unexpected

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to within and as a primary/main character of/as a memory of my mind, will expect the unexpected, and as that, I anticipate as I place value within expectations as being good and/or bad and if/when my expectations are not met – I unexpectedly become a sub-character creation from/of and as a memory of/as a character role that I recall my mother existing as – where when her expectations weren’t met she would become of/as a primary/main character of and as anxiety, thus, I see, realize and understand that I have in-fact became the downloaded main/primary characters/personalities within and as the mind of/as my parent/mother’s mind as consciousness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how within my anxiety is an expectation of having an experience of myself and when my expectation isn’t met, me as my mind goes into a sort of shift which then ripples throughout my entire physical body creating pain in my back and nausea as well as an increase in my breathing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience anxiety within and as me as my physical body where in any moment I suddenly feel as if I am going into shut down and where I experience nausea and my breathing will increase as my secret mind suddenly issues warnings of gloom and doom as the character who expects the unexpected.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel discomfort within my chest and back area when I experience anxiety within myself from living in anticipation, desire and expectation.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how when I anticipate I manifest expectation and expectation manifests separation from me as my physical body and my physical reality.

I forgive myself that as the character of/as my mind who expects the unexpected, I have accepted and allowed myself to not only expect the unexpected but to actually fear the unexpected.

I forgive myself that as the character of/as my mind who expects the unexpected, I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive myself as not being able to handle the unexpected.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create and manifest physical pain within my back from existing in fear of the unexpected.

I forgive myself for how I become as the character who expects the unexpected in how I loathe doing/being the same thing day in and day out, yet within that, I have become comfortable in and as the sameness of it all and thus I exist in fear of the unexpected.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become the character of expect the unexpected who thrives off of energy and whether it be negative or positive isn’t important because either way the character creation commits me to existing in/as separation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to attach emotional value to experiences of myself that first begin within and as expectations which consist of energetic charges of/as negative and/or positive.

I forgive myself for having expectations of myself where within that I manifest expectations of those around me and when my expectations aren’t met I judge my expression and the expression of others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compare my life and myself to others when I don’t meet my own expectations of myself thus, I forgive myself for believing that life has failed me because I see, realize and understand that my perception of failure exist within the design of expectation through comparison and failure is only a perception of/as the mind as consciousness.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I must have something to look forward to where within that I accept and allow myself to exist within and as a character of/as my mind/memories who expects the unexpected.

I commit myself to stop looking forward in anticipation and fear, wherein I project myself into a future of expectation which accumulates myself in and as anxiety which ultimately manifests illness and disease upon me as my physical body.

I commit myself to stop attaching emotions or feelings to experiences where within my expectations I create fear experiences generated first from desire.

I commit myself to stop charging in and as the direction of/as my mind through emotions and feelings in fear, anticipation and expectation and to instead stop and breathe and direct me here within and as the power to decide who I am in self-honesty in/as supporting a world where all experience life in dignity according to what’s best for all.

I commit myself to living here as breath, realizing how through accumulating myself here as the directive principle of and as my world I am able to correct that which I’ve been, and create and manifest that which I see, realize and understand can be a constant application of me in and as self-trust within accumulating myself as breath walking here as me in self-honesty in/as self-application.

I commit myself to living free from emotions and feeling and to realize that in and as breath it is possible to become completely aware of who I am as my physical body within and without equal and one with everything and all here

(Please Read Heaven’s Blog: Sub-Character Creation – Part 1 (Self-Forgiveness): DAY 113)

Day 114: Know Thyself

Eating egg yolks is as ‘bad as smoking’ in speeding up coronary heart disease – -

I used to believe whatever nonsense someone threw my way before I began walking the Journey to Life in writing and applying self-forgiveness, wherein I’ve realized that, hey, I can take self-responsibility for myself and for my world as myself and make decisions based upon what I have investigated and lived as, and how what’s best for me is according to what’s best for All.

It’s time we ask ourselves why is it that we wait around for somebody to tell us what to eat, what to believe in, how to behave, and what is best for who we are as our physical body.

So yes, I’ve come to realize that what is written in the above article, is simply Not a fact. I have been lowering my cholesterol for the past 6 months, and in doing so, I’ve been eating eggs at least 5 days out of every week. If you look at people who have normal cholesterol, you’ll find that it’s Not cholesterol that clogs arteries – it’s foods high in saturated and hydrogenated fats, and all that ‘white’ stuff, such as flour and sugar that leads to our demise.

An egg contains only two grams of saturated fat and 75 calories versus seven grams of saturated fat and 268 calories one will find in a small 3 1/2 ounce hamburger patty. Eggs actually qualify as “low in saturated fat”.

A point here to realize is, that if one’s cholesterol is high, then clearly it’s time to change one’s eating habits and lifestyle. Thus, take self-responsibility and investigate for self what is best for ones physical body, and make adjustments accordingly. Common sense is key and is something we as humanity are certainly lacking in.

If we want more nutritious eggs, then we better investigate what the hens are being fed. Did you know that hens that are fed on barnyard plant food produce eggs that are lower in cholesterol than commercially fed caged hens?

I mean, we allow hormones, antibiotics and pesticides to be injected in almost every food item we purchase! So is it really a surprise that more and more humans are becoming downright fat and sick? No, it isn’t. At this point, the egg yolk – is the least of our concerns.

We are knee deep in bullshit and there is not one single person to blame because we are All accepting and allowing ourselves to be contained and enslaved within it.

Stop buying into what those who have all the money want you to believe. Investigate the Solution that will give each and every one of us that which has Never existed within this world. A Life of Dignity as Heaven on Earth with Equal Money.

Please Read: Day 88: Advanced Economics

“I commit myself to Call on All Economists to Investigate their Integrity and to Insist that the Eco-System on Earth Be Restored to What it was Designed to Be, to Support Life.” ~ Bernard Poolman

“I commit myself to Call on All that Have a Sense of Integrity to Value Life, to Hear this Message – as there will Be an Accounting for what was Done to Life at Death and No One escapes this, no Matter how much Money one has.” ~ Bernard Poolman

—————–
Watch/Read the following Documentaries and Blog for reference:
*Fresh
*Soy
*Day 111 & Day 112: In the Name of Progress

Day 101: The Character: ‘I said No’

Today I watched from a distance as a mother was telling her 11 month old child, ‘I said No’, over and over in a very stern tone. I saw within myself how I had a reaction to her which is not surprising because when I was raising my children, I acted as the same. A character as a mother who automatically repeats, ‘No’, and/or ‘I said No’. I am now comprehending how ignorant the whole point of telling our young children ‘No’, really is. That’s not to imply that children don’t require direction so that they don’t get in harms way, however, yelling ‘No’ at children and/or spanking them, I now see is Not the solution. Thus, sharing here the following self-forgiveness.

For further context and understanding, please read the following article and blogs.
Feral girl, 5, found living with a herd of cows can ‘only communicate by mooing’
Sacrificial Love of the Mother: DAY 48
Parenting Building a Child’s Character: DAY 85
Day 107: The Ignorance of Intent

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to as a mother become the character who ‘automatically’ says ‘No’ to my children without even considering and/or questioning my automated response in the act of saying no.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stop and look within myself when I hear myself tell my child No, because if I were to look within myself then I will see that to just automatically say No is to abdicate responsibility to/for/as my child – where I completely miss-take an opportunity to assist them to touch, investigate, question and enjoy who they/we are so as to determine for themselves who they will be within and as a part of this physical world/reality/existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how I am a living mirror of my mother as she was hers and as my child will be mine – in how for generation after generation we’ve existed where each child is/has been conditioned through/as their parents mind into and as one’s own mind – thus we are continuing to exist within and as the same memories/characters/personalities/thoughts and physical behaviors/habits and language as those before us to such a degree that we are/have become automated in our raising of our children and, thus have/are forfeiting the very nature of life itself because in doing so, we are voluntarily admitting defeat as a parent – instead of walking as a living example of what it is to be responsible, self-honest, stable and consistent as support for/as the child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give in to the power of saying No because as a child, in/as my secret mind, exist a memory of how it looked and felt to see the face of my parent when they experienced the power and control of saying no, and thus, I now have an automated program running within me as my secret mind to also experience what I perceive that I must now experience as power and control in/as saying No.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand how I have come be automated to say No to my children within a positive energy experience where I accumulate and manifest myself from the starting point of/as friction/conflict as a negative energy experience and thus within and through the nature and action of me as blame, and within and as spite, I will excuse and justify my actions as I deliberately manipulate my child in order to gain, possess and empower my love onto my child within and as a controlling positive energy experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that when I say No to my child I am in fact fueling the child’s mind within a negative energetic charge as an experience of the mind in/as curiosity, thus the child will activate their secret mind where they will look for the opportunity to reach for that which they were told Not to, and within that will experience guilt to/toward themselves because they remember they were told Not to touch it, thus, to tell the child no instead of assisting the child in touching and investigating their world, only further enslaves the child to becoming a character within their mind where they then isolate themselves from their physical world/reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a world/money system where education is bought and paid for through memories/characters/personalities according to our past and history in/as money/survival, whereas we continue repeating cycles of abuse and neglect in which children of every generation continue to pay the pain forward – instead of standing up and stating what we know as true in that we require to Stop All systems within our world and begin again with a system which functions according to what’s best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be so involved in/as my own mind of seeking, wanting and desiring experiences for myself that I didn’t allow each and every moment of breath with my child to count in assisting them to see for themselves what is acceptable and what is not within and as our physical world/reality/existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support a world/money system where parents struggle to put food on the table and within that fail to educate and prepare children to become responsible adults who are willing and able to stand up for and as All living beings as equals.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how the role of money and struggling to survive within this world plays a major role in the life of being a parent, because I see how I was always running to get somewhere but in the process I lost my breath and myself where I barely even remember my life with my children when they were small.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put money first above everything including my children, all the while lying to myself that money wasn’t important because I didn’t want to face my responsibility within how our current world/money system exists – I didn’t want to face how I have accepted and allowed myself and all life to live in hell enslaved to a money system where only the few who are rich are free from the constant fear of living paycheck to paycheck where we fear for the future of our children and our own survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within existing in/as memories/characters and personalities of/as acts of automation to/towards children, and my world – have abdicated myself as my physical body and this physical reality – meaning – I have given up my right of/as life because in such automated acts of/as self, I am proving that I don’t care enough to slow myself down and breathe myself here, to actually support myself as all as life – to investigate myself and our current world/money system and therefore support a system where No one suffers, No one starves to death, No one goes to war for the right of land over those who are already living on the land, and No one goes without a home and clean water, thus, I see, realize and understand the common sense in supporting an Equal Money System where I will know for sure that All living beings and our Earth, will be genuinely provided and cared for.

I commit myself to Stop myself as ignorant acts of saying No to children within automated acts of/as memories/characters and personalities, because I see, realize and understand how through breathing, writing and self-forgiveness one is able to correct, realign and redesign themselves, thus is able to assist and support a world/money/education system according to what’s best for All.

I commit myself to investigate and forgive the memories/characters of/as my parents mind as consciousness as the memories/characters which are me as my mind and to assist and support myself to show how our world requires an education system where children are able to receive the support required in order to experience life of/as Heaven on Earth.

I commit myself to show how our world requires an education system that will prepare each one of us to become a self-aware, responsible part of the human race that lives a fulfilled and productive life of happiness and fun and, how Equal Money will ensure that everybody will be effectively educated to live in harmony with everything here including, plants, animals and our environment.

I commit myself to assist parents to see for themselves that the word No is actually not even necessary within a world where one is aware of themselves as breath.

I commit myself to show how the only real solution in assisting ourselves is one that will assist All living beings, thus a living solution is that of an Equal Money System which will guarantee life support for All life forms of Life on/as Earth.

I commit myself to support me as my physical body, to comprehend how life here on earth is a living representation of how, who and what exists within the mind physical body of/as the human.

I commit myself to show how who we are as our physical bodies within our physical reality, is all that we can actually trust, thus, in supporting an Equal Money system, we’re supporting life in trusting that which is real, our physical body and our physical reality.

I commit myself to show how we can change the very fabric of our being and thus change our world by simply placing ourself in the shoes of others.

**A MUST READ: Day 35: Equal Money will Save the World**

Day 100: For Giving Way

Art by Kelly Posey-

This is blog 100 for me in my walking the Journey to Life, and I’m going to begin by sharing the following quote by Sunette Spies – which is a good start for me in sharing how this process of daily writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective/commitment statements have assisted me.

“This is important to see, cause I mean – this is what humanity is doing – apparently giving up on humanity/this world, but that’s not the real story – there’s OTHER THINGS they want to do with their lives than commit themselves to standing with/for all, fascinating that we got to the point where, we’d live in HELL in the HOPE for desires; instead of living the certainty of who self is and what self is walking for self as for all.” ~ Sunette Spies

That’s where I was before beginning the process of walking self-forgiveness. I had given up on myself and certainly on humanity and this world. And, Yes, there were ‘other things’ I ‘thought’ I wanted to do with my life and, I never actually considered committing myself to standing with/for all.

I had become a living example of someone living in their own created Hell in the Hope for and the Desires of having and getting, and getting, and getting, but, never ever satisfied. I had no clue what it really is to be self-responsible and self-accountable and I certainly didn’t have a clue what it meant, “To walk for self as for All.”

Walking this process, is something that I take very seriously and, I am gradually forgiving my way to walking responsibly and accountable and, beginning to comprehend what it really means to Stand as Self, Walking for Self, as for All. Within that, I see how in self-honesty, I am able to support and trust myself for the first time in my life and thus, I am becoming able to stand Equal As and for All.

We as a humanity, have a very long road, however, when we come together as one, and put self-interest and greed aside and support an Equal Money system – in that, we’ll be doing ouselves a huge favor because we’ll be for the first time ever, supporting who we are as our Physical Bodies and our Physical Reality – that which we’ve always abused and neglected, will thus be supported in every way.

Consider the fact that we’re all neighbors here on earth and we’re all we’ve got, so, we’ve got to support ourself through supporting others – to Stop what we’ve accepted and allowed as our current world/money system and come together as one Huge Group to peacefully support a system which operates according to what’s best for All.

In Common sense, we can see how self-responsibility and self-accountability is in the willingness to give to all as one wishes to receive, because in the giving is where the quality of living self as life exists.

It’s the Ultimate Solution. Join us, Writing, Forgiving, Walking and Supporting in/as the Journey to Life. You’ll see for yourself.